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Heather Mills - Amputee Forum
Gizmo

If you could turn back time...

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what would you do differently? The other day, I watched "The Butterfly Effect" in the cinema and just loved it (it is about a guy who can go back in time and change things).

I would probably go for another line of studies (studied Economics, hated it - the only part I liked was advertising/marketing, but you need not really go to university to be good at it; the only thing which counts is creativity!). I had always wanted to study either languages or biology (crawling around in the jungle with gorillas or something like that), but everybody kept telling me that the job prospects would be extremely bad so I decided against it.

Right now, I am fine - also jobwise - but I have wasted a lot of time and energy in stupid marketing jobs, working 80 hours a week!

As far as my private life goes, I do not think that i would do anything differently. I was once tempted to stay in the US, since in the last month of my scholarship there I met someone interesting, but I am glad that I did not do it. Again I would choose not to have a family of my own.

Regards,

gizmo

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I love that movie, and am waiting for it to arrive (I bought it).

What I would change if I could is....I wouldn't have gotten heavily into drugs (crystal meth, speed) when I was 19. Then I would not have met my ex-husband, had to flee the state of AZ-running from gun wielding phsyco's and police, and then I would have had better medical care and may not have ended up an amputee.

But in the same respect...My philosophy is: I do not regret anything. Because if I did, I wouldn't be the well adjusted person I am now. If I hadn't made those mistakes early in life, I may have made them later, when it was too hard to correct. I wouldn't have met my current beau-who is very caring and has been with me (along with family) through every step (during last year-infection for 5yrs) of my sickness leading to amputation. I would not have the wonderful support system I have now...it has always been there, but I didn't see it for yrs.

I think everyone would change something in hindsight but then again everyone needs to make mistakes and choices and then see where they lead. It is all part of growing up.

:ph34r:

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There is an old saying, and I am cleaning it up here, that "If my mother had wheels she would have been a bus." (PM me if you want the "real" version!)

We all fantasize what we would have done differently, but I also have found that, while it makes for a good interlude, it can be counterproductive. As LC says, we wouldn't be who we are without the experiences we have had. So to say, from my vantage point of having had the experience, how I would live my life differently, makes the argument almost specious.

Yes, we all have regrets, and I suppose that was the crux of the question. The beauty of life is that we usually have the chance to correct things going forward. We cannot undo past hurts, for example, but we can try to prevent future ones.

But again, what do I know?

So: if I could turn back time I would have exercised more. But then, a Hollywood producer said on his 100th birthday, "If I had known I would live this long I would have taken better care of myself."

-m-

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I totally agree with LC. I wouldn't change a thing in my life. If I changed one little thing I might not be who I am now......and I kinda like me.

So nope, even if it was possible I'd still not do it.

Cat

P.S. Great movie by the way we loved it.

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Ushi(Giz),

I've been an amputee now for about 2 ½ years. Through the recovery process, I have realized so much more. I've learned to look forward, and use well your experience from the past, to make both the present and the future a better place. So at age 50, I wouldn't want to change a thing, because I am grateful for the wisdom that the past has given me, and that I am still here to make good use of it. Time and experience is the best teacher, and there is no going back. I believe that it is healthier to be ok with the present, or make a difference to improve things if you don't like the way that it is, rather than looking back and kicking yourself in the butt for the things that you did wrong, trying to figure out what you could have done differently. There is no time to waste on regrets, which is depressing, for life is precious and short. One should take responsibility for life, turn around what they don't like, and make it better.

L'CHAIM,

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You know at first I started off by saying, "no there is nothing I would do differently"! However, after giving it some thought, there is one thing I would change. That being, to NEVER have started the bad habit of smoking!!! :blink: I haven't touched any since I went into the hospital Jan 96 and NEVER will!! My Dr said, it wasn't the whole cause of the situation I find myself in today, PVD, but it surely played a role. So that definitely would be my one thing to do differently. The rest has been experiences from which I've grown to learned just how precious life is and to appreciate every day and the people around you. :D

Sheila lbk

Maine USA

Keep Smiling :)

You've got to fix what's inside, before you can feel outside.

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Wow like what a totaly huge questtion thingie to ask . What would have doned didfereneenlty ? Hmmm

Well , for me i t would be having the strenght andf courage to express myslef sooner to the person i am sooo in love with now . i think that that oif i dided that , many things would be differenat today for me anyway but , it doindnt happen then so here we are NOW . i suspose that i would have also likesd to have been stronger too to be able to accept who i am am now years ago . I know there is an expression thinhgie about stuff being clear in the past ( i forgetted it right now ) but i think that to go forwrds , i need to nopt worry too much about the past ( my waay huge weakness ) since there is nothing that can be doned about it ... just learn from teh mistakes made and move forwards .

" ... living in the twilight zone ... "

( Golden Earing )

I think living in the past is like country music , all they soing about is their ex-wife , ex-girlfriend , ex-pick up truck , ex-dog , ex-farm , ex-house , ex-cow , ex-beer and it alwasy rains . :P :P :P

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A slightly depressing topic...hmmm. Let's see here ....

What would Cher say to all this ..???

as i wip on the black wig and meter long false eyelashes ..cough..cough ... clearing throat...tuning the guitar... :D ..here goes :

....'If I could turn back time

If I could find a way

I'd take back those words that hurt you

And you'd stay .....'

hehehe :lol: :D :lol:

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OOOOOOoooooooooh Kaz not the body stocking.

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Oh darn it...forgot to put it on....next time, promise :lol:

I need some back up singers...Cat????

My tamborenist went off sick..so need to replace him too. I tell you, ...you just can't find the staff these days :blink:

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Hmmmmmmmm

Me singing and cats in pain have a lot in common.

Hey what the hell.......sign me up. :D

Cat

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Hi

I seen "The Butterfly Effect" . It was a good movie but had some sad parts. When I was first hurt I would answer differntly than now. I look at life differnt. God only allows us so much time in this earthly body( good for me I think I am missing a someting. Where is my leg :huh: ? HA! HA! :P ) . I want to make the most of the time I have remaining. Time is the most valuable thing you can give a person. You can make money, house, and any material thing. But, no amount of money can not buy more time. I want to use my time for good things but, being human I will still mess up and be mad and dwell on the past. This is a good subject that makes a person think. I wish you all well!

See ya

Clint :)

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I'd have taken a different route home twenty one years ago...

This was what was in my mind (except it was 32 years ago), plus I wouldn't have dated the idiot I was with at the time, but on reflection, if the accident hadn't happened, everything in my life would have been different, I wouldn't have met my husband and had two fantastic boys.

I believe our lives are mapped out for us, and if I hadn't travelled that particular route on that day, then something else would have happened in a different place.

How many times in our lives do we say 'if only'.

best wishes

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There isn't a lot i would change, i have been pretty lucky with my life. I suppose i would have thought about buying a house much earlier on if i had known how expensive they would become but i expect that is one of those "they never come down in price "things.

Oh and i would never have started smoking, it is hell trying to give em up

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I'd have taken a different route home twenty one years ago...

This was what was in my mind (except it was 32 years ago), plus I wouldn't have dated the idiot I was with at the time, but on reflection, if the accident hadn't happened, everything in my life would have been different, I wouldn't have met my husband and had two fantastic boys.

I believe our lives are mapped out for us, and if I hadn't travelled that particular route on that day, then something else would have happened in a different place.

How many times in our lives do we say 'if only'.

best wishes

Spot on Pam, I wouldn't have met the nurse I married, and I wouldn't have two fantastic kids and a mortgage etc. etc. and I probably wouldn't have bothered learning to drive a car! I wouldn't have gone back to college and got a better job as a result..... in fact, come to think of it, I'm really lucky I lost my leg!!!

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