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Heather Mills - Amputee Forum
anne.brook

An amputees mum

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Hi Anne, I was reading all the great advices the rest of our "family members" were giving to you and the last one, Afet's. said it all. "Victoria will get through this, especially with you by her side ''

I am also a right above knee amputee whom just 20 days after amputation was sent home, where the only one to help me was a nurse aid who would come everyday to give me a bath, check my stump, change my bed, take my temperature then leave. It was only for about 10 days. My husband had to go to work, my little girl would go to school and I would stay all day long looking at the walls. If I want to eat, drink etc, I had to help myself. I don't have any relative here in this wonderful country and since I had just moved from one state to another, I didn 't have anyone to call for help. All my husband's relatives lived 3 hours away and after all they are my husband's /

I am tell you this, not for you to feel sorry for me, but for your daughter to be grateful that she has you.

You know something, for the first time I am glad my mom wasn't alive to be where you are now.

Hope Victoria will drop the medication that turns her into a zombie and face the sun rise tomorrow with a smile of selfsure.

dea

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As I have already posted in another forum, I honestly believe that Hospitals should reccommend that prospective amputees ought to look at this site.

Thanks to all of you wonderful people, Victoria and I are already looking to the future with fresh hope. We still have our tears, and I expect we will for a time to come, but we are beginning to think of life without the drugs and on two legs, even if one isn't the one she was born with.

I know that she will read this post, and then read me the riot act, but I was considering going to the doctor, and asking for some pills to get me through this "down" time, but I really and truly can see that there will be some light at the end of the tunnel.

The most important thing is to support my daughter through what, I believe, was a really brave decision to make, and to remind myself that the alternative to her injuries all that time ago was not one that would have wanted to face.

Like most mums I get mad with her at times, but she knows that I would lay down my own life for her. She is a daughter that I am really proud of.

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Dear Anne I agree with you, I wish I had known about this site also before 9 years had passed since my amputation. Maybe you can spread the news while you are at places that you see the need of it.

I tell all the people who works with amputees or who are amputees themselves about this heaven place.

Dea

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I hope that I have helped spread the word.

The district nurse came in today to dress Victoria's wound from the surgery she had 7 months ago (it still has a gaping hole). Whilst she was in I asked her if she had heard of this forum, and as she hadn't, I suggested that she might tell any amputees she deals with about it.

She thought the forum was a brilliant idea, and says she will make the other nurses of our practise aware of it.

So if you get too many pain's (like me), I thought I was helping. :P

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Hi Mum

You've just made me cry :( (AGAIN). I have just read your posting from 11.11 on 8-3. I know this has been really hard for you and I am truly sorry for everything you have been through over these last 4 yrs, it has truly been hell for you. Yet even though I have done this your still so proud of me. We are unsure of what the future holds but no matter what I know we will deal with evcerything they throw at us just like we have over the last 4 yrs.

I am so proud of you mum and I just hope I can be as good a parent to Helen a you are to me. I love you :wub: .

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Hi Anne, welcome to the forum. It really is the best place for friends, help, advice and a lot of fun thrown in for free.

I pm'd you but did not get chance to welcomeyou properly here.

From the sound of things the relationship you have with your daughter is what will get you both through, with a great support team a lot can and will be achieved.

Once your daughter no longer needs the morphine she will get her life back and will be able to see things clearer. I needed strong doses of morphine to help me through the pain i was in before my op and i know just how hazy it can make you, now thankfully i only have the normal 40'something moments to contend with, and boy do i get a lot of them lol!! :wub:

It is 2yrs since my op and i never look back, i do just about everything as before and a lot more besides.

You and your daughter and the kids have a lot to look forward to. xx

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Anne,

I’ve read your posts and all of the responses and I wanted to add my two cents. I’ve been RAK since 1996. When I was told they were going to take my leg I took it in stride. I thought all I would need to do is get a prosthetic and I would be back to normal. Unfortunately it wasn’t that easy for ME. Notice the emphasis on ME. If you’ve read any of my posts on the Amputee Treatment Center forum you’ve seen that I am plagued with pain. Please keep in mind that I am in the vast minority. The majority of amputees are pain free except for phantom pain which we all get from time to time. If there’s anything to say for phantom pain….it doesn’t occur too frequently and when it does it doesn’t last long. At least that’s my experience. None of this is intended to discourage you but rather to give you and your daughter some advice. Make sure you tell the docs to pay particular attention to the nerve endings. You can tell them that you know someone (me) who has had constant pain for ten years. I don’t know what they would have to do but being docs, they should know. I’m convinced that sensitive nerve endings are the source of my problem. I’m also convinced that the problem can be avoided if the doc knows what he is doing. Let me repeat that I am in the minority and the chances of having the same problem are very small but it doesn’t hurt to have it covered. I hope I have been helpful but I’m not taking any chances. I’ll say a prayer for both you and your daughter.

jackcham

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Make sure you tell the docs to pay particular attention to the nerve endings. You can tell them that you know someone (me) who has had constant pain for ten years. I don’t know what they would have to do but being docs, they should know. I’m convinced that sensitive nerve endings are the source of my problem. I’m also convinced that the problem can be avoided if the doc knows what he is doing.

I really agree with you there Jack. I think that a lot of our pain could have been avoided if our attending doctors paid more attention.

Well said.

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I really agree with you there Jack. I think that a lot of our pain could have been avoided if our attending doctors paid more attention.

Well said.

*sigh* I went back to my surgeon a few weeks ago... I have this weird thing that feels like there is a bone chip (no, not the end of my bone) or a STAPLE or something in there (in the padding below the bone)... If I lay my residual down on the couch just right, or when I rock back in my prothesis I experience a shooting, searing pain for just a moment (thank God it is only momentary). My surgeon said there is nothing there that could hurt! I'm demanding an MRI. Scheduled for Mar 20.

It's a shame we are not taken seriously by medical professionals. I could write a book on this and how not being taken seriously cost me my leg.

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Hi Marilyn

When I first came home from the hospital, I refused to take any narcotic pain medicine. I had a nerve ending on the side of my stump, which had a hole in it, and had to be grafted over, that gave me holy h***.

Eventually, (a month or so), it grew new tissue around it and quieted down. Even today, I can tell that it is still in there, (I call it my Lion), and it wants to roar, but is muted.

If you suspect something, check with your doctor, and if you still aren't satisfied, check with another. If all say that what you are experiencing is normal, then accept it for the time being and wait for it to heal. It takes time, but will come around.

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I have encouraged my daughter to join your..... merry band of people,

I was just re-reading these posts.

Merry band of people

I like that.

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Aw Jim, it was meant as a compliment. Since we joined this forum, and, I repeat, "you merry band of people" we have smiled more in the last couple of weeks than we have in the last 4 years. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

At last we can see that there WILL be light at the end of this extremely long tunnel, and no doctor had made us believe it before.

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Aw Jim, it was meant as a compliment.

I thought for sure that it was

My slogan at the bottom: "It's not possible to be Grateful and Unhappy at the same time". Is not there to be catchy.

It is something that I believe very strongly. Whenever I am unhappy, it is because I am not being grateful - for whatever - at that moment.

I call it: AN ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE

When it seems impossible to find something to be grateful about, I go for: "I'm still looking at the grass from the green side up".

OR: Spend an hour watching a TV article about the children at St. Jude's hospital here in the states. I did my first month or so after my amputation and it changed my outlook forever. They are the bravest souls that I have ever witnessed.

I have nothing to complain about and everything to be thankful (spelled Grateful), since watching them battle their desease.

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Hope Victoria will drop the medication that turns her into a zombie and face the sun rise tomorrow with a smile of selfsure.

dea

Wow, I couldn't agree more with Jim and his "Attitude of Gratitude" and the effects of seeing the strength in children. :)

I rely ALOT on music to help me through. My tastes may be a little different than other's, but reading this made me think of one of my favorite Bob Marley tunes. This is a simple little song that says alot to me. This man spoke alot of truth in his short life.

Rise up this morning

smiled with the rising sun

three little birds

pitch by my door step

singing sweet songs

of melodies pure and true

saying, this is my message to you:

Don't worry about a thing

cause every little thing is gonna be alright

don't worry about a thing

every little thing is gonna be alright

I don't mean to geek too much, but after my surgery, the first time I played this CD, I cried like a baby. But you know, it's true. Every little thing is gonna be alright.

If you ever get a chance, give him a listen... :)

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Sounds good we'll give it a try Shane. Any "little thing" that makes every little thing ok, is ok by me. ;) ;) ;)

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;) ;) ;)

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Just wanted to add my welcome to you Anne and to your daughter Victoria. I hope that you find what you need here. There are some great spirits gathered here. I also wish you both a lot of positive thoughts in the days to come.

Carol

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I'm off for a few weeks to Spain. Just a breather before Victoria has her surgery. She is due to join me for a much needed break.

She sees the prosthetics dept. at the end of the month, but is now a lot more positive, and all due to this forum.

Thanks to all of you for lifting our spirits, just when they were rock bottom.

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I apologize for being so slow with this welcome that is meant for both you Anne and your daughter Victoria. Being here quite a while now myself, I can certainly say you've come to the right place for some great wisdom, encouragement and always a BIG smile. :D Wishing you both the best on this much needed break, keep good positive thoughts and we'll be waiting to hear about your relaxing time. ;)

Sheila lbk

Maine USA

Keep Smiling :)

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Marilyn, a bone scan might be more worth while than an MRI. You may have what are called bone spurs. Little short rough kinda bones which grow from the main bone. In your case the fibula. They are sharp and hurt to touch. I had a couple and you have 2 choices; more surgery to snap them off or you can advise your prothesist and they can build the socket around them ie leave room so that they don't rub. The second was my prefered option and they no longer cause grief.

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Mel, thanks for the good words. I ended up cancelling the MRI because the pain has gotten quite less. It hasn't hurt in the prothesis in 2 weeks.

I did find a new oncologist and have a consultation on March 27. My first oncologist didn't believe in follow up! :unsure:

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Hi Everyone. Today's not a good day for either Vickib, Lil Boffin or me as we are getting really scared. My daughter, Victoria goes into hospital tomorrow for her AkA on Wednesday.

As time draws nearer, we are all afraid of whats to some. I know that that sounds silly as we have been fighting doctors just to get to this stage, but now that the time is here the fear factor has set in.

I will keep you all posted on her progress, but ask you all to pray for her.

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