Jump to content
Heather Mills - Amputee Forum
anne.brook

The journey has now begun

Recommended Posts

Guest bearlover

Hi Vicki! your not kidding when you say that getting a right fit is sooooooooo fustrating! It is enough to make a person crazy :o :blink: It took me a long time to get a good fit. I kept shrinking like crazy! Socket after socket and liner after liner..I felt like I was going to lose my mind as well as my leg! Hang in there it will get better. It just takes some of us a little longer...Happy to se you post again! ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have started this as a new post, hoping that in the future, when I look back at it, I can wonder at my fears, and laugh.

WOW!! Four years and now look at the change and progress in just the past 3 months. I cannot imagine what you've been through in the past 4 years. But I am absolutely thrilled to read how well you are doing now. This thread (now @276 posts) is an awesome diary and a very rare oppurtunity for folks facing limb loss to read and get a much more clear picture of things they and their family might expect. No matter how hard we try, I doubt any of us could sit down and relate to a newcomer the details of those early days near as well.

Best wishes Anne and Vicki. You and Roz have really set the bar high. Thanks to you all!!! :D :D :D

"Don't worry 'bout a thing, cause every little thing gonna be alright..." ;) ;) ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have started this as a new post, hoping that in the future, when I look back at it, I can wonder at my fears, and laugh.

WOW!! Four years and now look at the change and progress in just the past 3 months. I cannot imagine what you've been through in the past 4 years. But I am absolutely thrilled to read how well you are doing now. This thread (now @276 posts) is an awesome diary and a very rare oppurtunity for folks facing limb loss to read and get a much more clear picture of things they and their family might expect. No matter how hard we try, I doubt any of us could sit down and relate to a newcomer the details of those early days near as well.

Best wishes Anne and Vicki. You and Roz have really set the bar high. Thanks to you all!!! :D :D :D

I agree 100%.

JudyH

"Don't worry 'bout a thing, cause every little thing gonna be alright..." ;) ;) ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest bearlover

Vicki! Boy can I relate to the pain you had for 4 years! I like you suffered much pain also witha bad leg. But it was due to a birth defect. Many operations since childhood which only lead to a bone infection that i had for about 10 years on and off.. It finally got searious enough that it was life threating and I had to l have the leg amputated. After suffering since infancy. All those operations only to have it amputated in the long run. I still have much pain and phantom pain. But Iam told Iam "lucky :rolleyes: " because the amputation saved my life. even tho Iam still in quite a bit of pain...Sometimes I fell Iam worse off. But know that I had no choice in the matter.. ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi all

My computer has been down for a while, so I have not been able to keep up.

My job is almost done, and Victoria. as you can tell is coming on in leaps and bounds. his is in no small part due to the invaluable support my new friends here in the forum have afforded Victoria and I.

My husband has booked a six weeks cruise for us, as he says that I need a rest. Whilst I am looking forward to seeing some new places, I am nervous about leaving Victoria for so long. She assures me that she can cope, and that she has enough friends to supply transport when she needs it. Anyway if all continues to go well, we leave on 2nd December ans return onm 14th January.

This last 3 months has been a long winding road, but when I think what the last 4 years has been like for us all, I know that the best is yet to come. Victoria has had mountains to climb, and I am so proud of the way way she has conquered them.

In a way, I feel sorry for her husband, if he had only had the guts to look after his wife, he could have been as proud of her as we all are. But now, I don't think he hasd a chance, because she now longer needs or wants him.

There is still some concern about Victoria's eating, and she is continuing to lose weight, but at a much slower rate. I know that she wants me to have the holiday with my husband, and that will spur her on to complete this partcular hurdle.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm very pleased for you, Anne. :D

For a while now, you have sounded (to me, anyway) as though you have needed a holiday and the chance to spend time on yourself. I hope you have a glorious time - you lucky devil! ;)

I'm sure Vicki will be absolutely fine whilst you're away. :)

Take care

Lizzie :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest bearlover

Hi Ann! Happy to see you post again! I hate to say "I TOLD YOU SO" But I told you!! I told you Vicki would amaze you! :) And look back at all she has been through and wonder WOW! She will continue to amaze you all the more! You have did a wonderful job taking care of her! And now she os almost ready to zore! :P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Anne

Have fun and relax on your cruise. Vicki will be fine. She has obviously thought things through and made plans to be self-sufficient (with a little help) while you're gone,

This will allow her to explore her own capabilities. You haven't mentioned your husband much, but he's quite a man.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Gil, you know, that if my husband wasn't the guy he is, I couldn't have supported Victoria the way I have. He is truly someone very special, even more so because he isn't even Victoria's biological dad. We married when Victoria was 19 and quite a handful, but has been better than her natural father was. So even if he has taken a back seat over the last 3 months, I intend to let him know that I truly appreciate him.

I did a lot of soul searching before I agreed to the holiday with my husband, and went over every possible eventuality with Victoria about how she would manage without me, but to her credit, she has insisted that I owe it to myself and my husband to let go. I still have some reservations, but I also have a mobile telephone, and can fly back any time, if I have to.

I also know that lots of you have been telling me, for some time, to back off. Now that I have agreed, I can actually admit that the pressure has taken it's toll, but I would do it all over again if I had to, as I believe that is what being a mom actually means. But I stiull thank you for telling me what I needed to hear. :) :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Anne and Vicki, this thread was "titled" VERY well indeed... as I'm sure you've both found, every single day is the beginning of another leg in your "journey."

It's so good to hear that Vicki's putting together an independent life... and that YOU'RE getting what sounds like a lovely holiday, Anne! By your departure date, I'm positive that Vicki will be well-established and that you'll feel comfortable about getting some rest and relaxation with your hubby. Look at how far you've all come in just three months and imagine how much MORE progress can occur between now and December.

Vicki, you seem to be on the right track in rebuilding your life. When I lost my leg, I didn't have family around to take care of me: I'm single; my parents had both passed away; my sister lives over 400 miles from me; and the rest of my extended family is at least halfway across the continent from me. So I was "on my own" right from the start. My friends were amazing... there was always someone whom I could call on if I needed something I couldn't manage on my own. And learning how much I COULD do without assistance gave me the confidence to keep expanding my boundaries. Now, nearly 19 months after my surgery, it's EXTREMELY rare for me to require assistance... just about as rare as it was before my amputation. And the fact that I've been able to DO that is very empowering! You'll soon reach that point yourself... just wait and see!

Shane makes a wonderful point... this thread, with so many people participating and Anne and Vicki sharing their thoughts, feelings, and experiences so openly, is an astonishing record of amputation and recovery. With Anne and Vicki's permission, I'd like to see it "pinned" somewhere on the forum, so that it would be easy for new amps to find... it's an inspiring story and a profound one!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Both Victoria and I would be thrilled beyond belief if our story, before, during and after her amputation could help even one person as much as this forum has helped us. It has been a vehicle to share feelings, emotions, friendship and many, many other things during, for us, what has been a difficult time.

I really find it hard to believe that in only three months, Victoria has overcome such a major physical and emotional journey, and has truly begun her new life. My pride in her achievement is imnpossible to put into words.

One other thing I forgot to "brag" about was that from the 600mg of morphine per day, plus all the other medication Victoria has been on, she now takes only 5mg of Morphine a day, with no other medication. Next week even that will stop. I really believe that it is a testament to her determination that she has achieved so much so quickly. All of this was self driven, with the doctors who got her on the drugs in the first place telling her to slow down,

Finally in this post, thank you cherylm for all your advice. I knew you were right, but as I've said so many times, all I ever wanted to do was be the best mom I could be, and there wasn't a book written to tell me how to do that. But I love you for it just the same :D :D :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Anne

I do hope you and your husband enjoy your holiday.

It sounds like Vicki is doing brilliantly.

Ann

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The best news in four years is here.

Victoria is now officially drug free!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

She had her last 5mg of morphine on Sunday morning.

She has been going to her own home for weekends for the last month, but will now look at returning for good in the next few weeks, I will miss her, but am glad she is ready to get on with her own life, We only live within two minutes of each other, so we will still see each other on a regular basis. Also, as she is not able to drive yet, she will still need me for transport for shopping, hospital visits etc. etc.

On another note, I think her husband is seriously wanting to come back, but Victoria will deal with that in her own way.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Excellent news :D apart from the husband :o

Sometimes I think that prayers don't work and then I change my mind. Thanks for that Anne. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Anne

Although i don't post very often these days, i have followed your story. The "journey" is now taking a different road from the one you first posted about, this one you can enjoy. There will still be lots of new things experience, ups and downs will come and go but the downs get fewer and further apart.

Well done to you and all of your familly for staying so very strong throughout.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi All

As mum said I am now officially not an addict :D . It feels so good.

I am at home as we speak and adapting to it nicely, I miss mum but as she said she's only round the corner if I need her.

My stump has shrunk down yet again but i'm off to the hosp again on Wed so maybe they'll line it AGAIN :( with a view to doing yet another casting but we'll see. Physio is going really well although i'm desperately trying to lose the stick i'm using, which hoefully will happe within the next few wks or so.

So all in all things are defintely looking up.

Speak Soon

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest bearlover

Hi vicki! I know what you mean when you say that the shrinking is fustrating :angry: I hope you stay stable soon.. Nice to see you post.. You and your Mum are awesome!! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Bear, all I can say is that Victoria is my reason for being. I am as sure of her love for me as she is sure of my love for her.

So, as I said before, I will miss her, but, hopefully my support has made her ready for starting her new life. I will always be there if she needs me, but hey, that's what moms are for.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi all again

Mum what can I say you know without a shadow of a doubt our loves on the same wavelength

As for your support I could not have got through all this without you or your support, you never cease to amaze me and where you manage to find just the right words at exctly the right time. The last few mnths have been tough for all of us and all I can say mum is you've shone brighter than anyone I know or could possibly wish to know.

Thanks just doesn't seem to express how both grateful and lucky I am to have such a great person fighting my corner. Ilove you mum and thanks for everything.

I'll c u l8r

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Vicki, sounds like things are on the up, well done you and well done you mum, best of luck 4 the future.

neil x :angry:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The newest, and most difficult for me, event happened today. Although for Victoria, I am sure it is the most exciting.

Victoria has moved out of my house today, and back to her own house.

She looked so happy and proud to be starting "the rest of her life". I, too am happy for her, but will sadly miss my girl.

I want to thank everyone here in the forum who have read my pathetic ramblings, and showed my hope when I couldn't find it.

This has been a tremendous journey for all of us, but I can happily say that although it was frightening, at times, our arrival at the end of this part of the journey sees us intact.

Most of all, Victoria, you are beautiful, brave and ready for whatever you choose to do with your life. Totally pain and drug free, your courage will see you through. I love you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hi anne

that is wonderful news! i have been away from the forum for a few weeks and have just had a quick read, you have all come along way! you should be proud of yourself and each other.

brilliant news on the drug free new life style, all i can say is vicki is an inspiration, and will give others the strength to get through their rough times.

enjoy your holiday and look forward to the next instalments

take care and keeps smiling

Terri ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest bearlover

What A wonderful Mum you are. You are both so blessed to have each other. You did a wonderful job Ann. Kudos to both :) :rolleyes: :P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×