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Heather Mills - Amputee Forum
Sparky

I have good news and bad news

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:lol: :lol: :lol:

Love the avatar Sparky :P ....I wouldn't do that..honest......maybe :rolleyes:

As it's a Saturday night, lets just say we're getting hammered :P

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Patient: I'm in a hospital! Why am I in here?

Doctor: You've had an accident involving a bus.

Patient: What happened?

Doctor: Well, I've got some good news and some bad news. Which would you like to hear first?

Patient: Give me the bad news first.

Doctor: Your legs were injured so badly that we had to amputate both of them.

Patient: That's terrible! What's the good news?

Doctor: There's a guy in the next ward who made a very good offer on your slippers.

Thanks, I needed a laugh

JudyH

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A preacher visiting his flock in the country happens to see a pig walking around on 3 legs. The preacher stopped by and asked the farmer. My son, what's with your pig with only 3 legs?

Well preacher says the farmer, this pig is very special to my family and me, well just 2 months ago, I'm working underneath my tractor, the jack fell and the tractor was crushing me. I yelled and my pig rushed to my rescue, dug me out and pulled me away from the tractor.

Well that's very commentable says the preacher..but..

That's not all preacher, last week my house caught fire and my pig pulled my 2 young daughters to safety. It even received a hero gold ribbon, from the village mayor.

I understand says the preacher, but that still doesn't explain the missing leg!

Well like I said preacher, this pig is very special to my family and well, we just cannot bring ourselves to eat it all at once.

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