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Heather Mills - Amputee Forum
Pat.UK.

Where R All the old member's?.

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Hi

I don't seem to know many of the people on here now apart from Cat and a few others.

No Muz and a lot of the one's that were always posting I see Cat as been promoted well done.

I have seen a few changes some for the good and some not so good I was in the first few to join my membership number is in the low 30's without members like Muz the place don't seem the same no Eddie also the change in moderators we lost one of the best one's we had that young lady helped Lot's of people including myself shame she had to go.

Then there was the two boy's M&M they helped to keep this site happy make some day's made us feel bright when we were not.

Anyway I have had my say I will still visit every so often but it's not like it was a few month's ago.

Best wishes Pat.

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Muz - Marcus - Eddie - Paul - Afet - Siobahn - Sanicki - Aquarium 63 - Awesome Blue - and I know that I'm missing quite a few others.

I started to leave, and then felt like I was biteing off my nose to spite my face

Like in life, business, neighborhoods, clubs - anywhere, people come and go. The personality definitely has changed - but it's purpose hasn't, and that is to help others.

Someone once told me not to: "Put personalities over principles"

I see this as a support group first, and a social group second - not the other way around.

Nobody here is expendable - and that includes me. On the other hand, everyone is definitely needed to make this work.

I hope you stick around Pat. Your expertise and experience is much needed.

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Fair point Jim, but...

I think that for some people the support gained from boards like this comes not just from sharing experiences and getting advice but from the social interaction and fun that can be had with people who are in a similar situation to yourself. Don't downplay the role of the "social" side of sites like this, many people probably log in and look mainly to hear the latest exploits of the regular posters, and I for one a bit of that and (formerly) for a bit of a laugh. If you can't have fun and free speech on a place like the internet, where can you? The forum is big enough, with enough branches to cater for both sides...

Mike

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Mike,

I agree.

Yes the forum is for support and info and advice, BUT I also feel that some of those factors came from the humour and interaction that we had. I think that the forum dynamic has changed, and this can be seen from the lessening of postings, and the dates that the threads carry too!

I do feel that more members were encouraged to participate, through the interacting threads, and this was a good thing. I've been posting for almost 3 years, and this site has provided me with support, info and advice BUT also some interaction with people, who knew, really knew, how it feels to be an amputee and to cope with the loss of a limb, and the changes to your personality too.

I know that I'm facing a large op next Friday, to remove my neuromas, and I could really do with some witty quip from M & M, some really good advice and wise words from Afet, and for me, I miss their interaction on this board.

Sue

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I for one don't see much difference between work and this forum. When a new person starts working with you there is a time of adjustment, they are not the same person as the one they have replaced. People come and they go, you learn from each other have a laugh, socialise and move on. The senior members that have stayed to keep the knowledge flowing have made me welcome and feel part of the forum family – thank you. I personally enjoy the humour on this forum, I haven't contributed much to the more technical queries as I am still learning, when I can I will until it's time for someone else to take over.

Sue, it's not easy coming up with an acceptable quip, good advice and wise words when I haven't really had any interaction or know much about what you are going through with the neuroma. I do know how lonely it can get when waiting for your op and my thoughts are with you.

The forum is dead. Long live the forum!

Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Mike, are you going to tell us the answer or do we have to send in our best guesses?

Was it to keep their ears warm :)

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Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Radio transmitters in their helmets to give directions?

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I too miss Afet, Marcus, Muz and all but I still love coming here. For a long time, this forum WAS my social life. It was and still is the best thing to happen to me after my amp. I don't know where I would be without the support and advice from everyone here. The best part was actually meeting some of you. The friendships I've made here are genuine and deep and I can't wait to see everyone again.

Things have changed somewhat, but the thing that brought us together has not. We are all still here for each other.

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The internet is a constantly evolving place, people aren't going to stay in one place forever, people come and people go, don't hanker (spelling?) after the 'good old days', others will fill the gaps these people leave. If they've gone, they've gone for their own reasons, I for one think it's petty and selfish if they deprive others on here (as they seemingly have) of useful input. People live with their own egos, good luck to them wherever they go, they'll live their lives glancing off people rather than developing long and meaningful relationships.

How deep is that! :blink:

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...I've never heard (and you win Muz) so much bildge in all my life... You guys must have all the time in the world and no life to fill it. :)

...

As you can see from the above quote, most of what I posted was utter drivel so I can't see how anyone has been deprived of anything meaningful. As for the second comment, well you were partially correct in that this forum was consuming too much of my time so I decided to devote my energies back to the things that are really important in my life and make way for the newcomers. I have made some good and lasting friendships here and learnt a lot from you all... mostly but not always the experience has been a positive one. I still pop in from time to time and I can still be PM'ed if anyone wishes to.

Keep up the good work of supporting the newbies ...

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OOps... don't take it too personally Muz... that obviously meant more to you than it did to me... it's unfortunate you've posted a quote, as it's now completely out of context... hey ho...

Old and new alike should use the forum as much or as little as they like as far I'm concerned... everyone should be able to take some criticism without taking their ball home....

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If by "taking their ball home" you mean the act of gagging/suspending/moderating valuable mebers as you don't agree with them then, good point well made mate! Although I would say more like kicking the ball into a river...

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Old and new alike should use the forum as much or as little as they like as far I'm concerned... everyone should be able to take some criticism without taking their ball home....

Does that include criticism of people that no longer have the right of reply?

I thought you said it was petty and selfish to deprive others of their knowledge, now you seem to think its fine.

I dont tend to post on here anymore as I was disappointed with the manner in which the atmosphere changed particularly following the way in which a respected professional in the industry was treated. I still lurk to found out any news/tips. If I'm being selfish then fine, I can live with that.

The site will obviously change with new people joining and others leaving, that is only natural, but to criticise others from staying away for reasons that you, nor I for that matter, have detailed knowledge of is wrong in my opinion.

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I'm afraid that may be the difference between you and I, Ian. If I make a comment like that I actually mean what I say as you may have noticed in some of my previous posts. I don't try to dress it up as a joke and I can be thoroughly nasty at times.

If anyone's unsure of the context of that quote it can be seen in full along with the rest of the thread by clicking on the little purple arrow next to the quote header.

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I see this as a support group first, and a social group second - not the other way around.

I learned some time ago that the only one that I can speak for is myself. As anyone can see by my quote, I said that: I SEE THIS AS A SUPPORT GROUP - FIRST, AND A SOCIAL GROUP - SECOND

I didn't suggest that everyone else should see it that way, nor that I was excluding the social aspect of it. I was just putting them in order of my priorities. AND, I said that I saw it this way - not you or anyone else.

Whether someone else chooses to stay or go, is strictly up to them. Personally, I enjoyed their company while they were here - but there are a lot of decent new people also. If and when the day comes that I no longer find this satisfying to me personally - then it will be time for me to make my choice. Until then, I'm here with the rest of you - that want to be here.

I can't think of how to make it any simpler.

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I'm not dressing anything up as a joke, I mean everything I say, but it's a web forum, not real life... that's my point. The fact is that none of us actually know the full ins and outs of anything that's gone on. So if people make clear statements about specifically 'leaving' a forum, I think that's petty.

For what it's worth, I have voiced my opinion with PMs to the moderators in support of one or two people on here when I've felt they were being badly treated (including a coupl who have now 'left'), but I've never known all the facts, how would any of us?

I just find that people get too mis-understood on these forums for anyone to take anything seriously enough to decide never to frequent a particular site... but I surpose it takes all sorts...

It's good you're here Muz...

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Personally, I enjoyed their company while they were here

Me too Jim.

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I've not been posting much myself, lately. That's partly due to my wife being back in hospital, fixing a fix, sort of.

The main reasons for not posting has been that I've got my answers (thanks to a bunch of people) and I haven't seen anything lately that I can add to.

Just for myself, I'm not planning on leaving here anytime soon. I may not post a lot, for the above reasons, but I check new topics regularly, like this one.

I certainly can't say I'm an "old hand" or a "newbie", I'm just somewhere in the middle. I guess that applies to my perception of this forum and others I belong to.

To date, I've never met a person from this forum, or any other. Sometimes I think I "know" someone because of posts they've sent or PM's that I've gotten. I try to keep the "fun stuff" private to people who have allowed me to E-mail them.

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Please let's not work ourselves up to another "explosion"... it's just not worth the cost.

Yes, I miss any number of folks who have "faded away" for any number of reasons. I know that I'm not exactly one of the "old members" -- like Gil, I'm somewhere in the middle -- but I think I've been hanging around here long enough to know about some of the "oldies but goodies." Wherever they are, whatever they're doing, I wish them well.

What I don't understand here, is what good it does to squabble among ourselves about what may or may not have been said to whom about what, or what any of that may or may not have had to do with someone deciding to "move on" or "cut back" or whatever their decision might be. We can all argue our own opinions until we're blue in the face... but only the folks personally involved know all the facts and the reasons for their individual decisions. Rank-and-file members complaining to (or about) other rank-and-fille members, quoting bits of old posts in or out of context, and just generally bemoaning the fact that life is full of changes seems so futile to me... and will do absolutely nothing to help recapture "what it was like before."

I still see some of the "old hands" pop up occasionally, and I'm glad of that. Perhaps in time whatever circumstances led to our present "factions" will be settled and the Forum will move in yet another direction. Or perhaps not. That's the thing about life... an awful lot of it is random and the best we can do is to "ride it out" and have the best time we can along the way.

Until then, can't we all just be friends?

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Please let's not work ourselves up to another "explosion"... it's just not worth the cost.

Yes, I miss any number of folks who have "faded away" for any number of reasons. I know that I'm not exactly one of the "old members" -- like Gil, I'm somewhere in the middle -- but I think I've been hanging around here long enough to know about some of the "oldies but goodies." Wherever they are, whatever they're doing, I wish them well.

What I don't understand here, is what good it does to squabble among ourselves about what may or may not have been said to whom about what, or what any of that may or may not have had to do with someone deciding to "move on" or "cut back" or whatever their decision might be. We can all argue our own opinions until we're blue in the face... but only the folks personally involved know all the facts and the reasons for their individual decisions. Rank-and-file members complaining to (or about) other rank-and-fille members, quoting bits of old posts in or out of context, and just generally bemoaning the fact that life is full of changes seems so futile to me... and will do absolutely nothing to help recapture "what it was like before."

I still see some of the "old hands" pop up occasionally, and I'm glad of that. Perhaps in time whatever circumstances led to our present "factions" will be settled and the Forum will move in yet another direction. Or perhaps not. That's the thing about life... an awful lot of it is random and the best we can do is to "ride it out" and have the best time we can along the way.

Until then, can't we all just be friends?

Here, here..... though personally I quite like a bit of a squabble now and then :P ... it cements good relationships and gets weak ones out of the way early... ;)

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Hi

Well this thread as brought some of the people that have been missing from this forum out again that's a good thing.

But it's wrong to infer that they are squabbling it's that they are stating there opinions for not always posting let's all get back to posting when we think we having something that might be of use to help other's or we think of something funny then let's share it with each other.

Thanks Nestudas for your PM. nice to hear from you I will get back in touch.

So may I wish every member a Merry Christmas and may we all stay friends and go back to how we were before these little misunderstanding.

Remember we all have our own thoughts and some we must keep to ourselves.

Good luck to new and old members.

Nice to see you back Muz and all the other member's that have come back.

Best wishes Pat.

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You can't start a thread about people not being here without the reason they aren't here anymore coming up...

I'd like to join you in wishing everyone a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year...

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You can't start a thread about people not being here without the reason they aren't here anymore coming up...

I'd like to join you in wishing everyone a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year...

Hi Oneblueleg.

I take your point.

History we cant change but the future we can let's try and make amends Please.

Best wishes Pat.

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..........................

So may I wish every member a Merry Christmas and may we all stay friends and go back to how we were before these little misunderstanding.

Remember we all have our own thoughts and some we must keep to ourselves.

Good luck to new and old members.

Nice to see you back Muz and all the other member's that have come back.

Best wishes Pat.

Very well said. I don't always have to agree with everyone, nor them with me .......but I don't have to be disagreeable and I won't put up with someone else who is. . Discussions and an exchange of ideas - respectfully - are always healthy. Arguments, I just don't have time for.

It looks like we are all back on the right track, so as one of my great-granddaughters would say: "Let's go for it".

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Muz - Marcus - Eddie - Paul - Afet - Siobahn - Sanicki - Aquarium 63 - Awesome Blue - and I know that I'm missing quite a few others.

I started to leave, and then felt like I was biteing off my nose to spite my face

Like in life, business, neighborhoods, clubs - anywhere, people come and go. The personality definitely has changed - but it's purpose hasn't, and that is to help others.

Someone once told me not to: "Put personalities over principles"

I see this as a support group first, and a social group second - not the other way around.

Nobody here is expendable - and that includes me. On the other hand, everyone is definitely needed to make this work.

I hope you stick around Pat. Your expertise and experience is much needed.

Jim,

I remember telling you that although I was new I definitely hoped you would not leave - I hoped my request helped you to decide. Your perspective is needed. I am very glad you stayed.

JudyH

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