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Ally

In honour of the silly season and silly people

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This isn't amputee related, but it gave me a smile. And it is the silly season after all.....

IN HONOUR OF SILLY PEOPLE

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On Woolworth's Tiramisu dessert (printed on the bottom) :

"Do not turn upside down"

Well...duh, a bit late, huh!

On Pick 'n Pays peanuts :

"Warning---contains nuts"

Talk about a news flash

On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine :

"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication"

We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head colds off those bulldozers.

On a Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding :

"Product will be hot after heating"

...and you thought???...

On a Clicks hair dryer :

"Do not use while sleeping"

That's the only time I have to work on my hair!

On a bag of Simba Chips :

"You could be a winner! No purchase necessary! Details inside."

...the shoplifter special??

On a bar of Dove Soap :

"Directions : Use like regular soap"

...and that would be???...

On some Checkers frozen dinners :

"Serving suggestion : Defrost"

Please note that it's just a suggestion.

On the packaging of a Rowenta Iron :

"Don't iron clothes on body"

But wouldn't this save me time?

On Nytol Sleep Aid :

"Warning : May cause drowsiness"

...and I'm taking this because???...

On some brands of Christmas lights of eastern origin :

"For indoor and outdoor use only"

As opposed to what?

On a Japanese food processor :

"Not to be used for the other use."

Now, somebody out there, please help me on this. I'm a bit curious.

Instructions on a SA Airways packet of peanuts :

1. Open Packet

2. Eat nuts

Step 3....say what???

On a child's Superman costume :

"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

Don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.

On a German Chainsaw :

"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals"

Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?

:P

And no, I didn't concoct this, it's an old one doing the rounds again, but it's fun.

Happy festive season everyone!

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On some brands of Christmas lights of eastern origin :

"For indoor and outdoor use only"

As opposed to what?

That used to be # 72 on the menu :)

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....On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine :

"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication"

We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head colds off those bulldozers....

You may joke, Ally, but there's a road traffic sign (close to Sparky's 'neck of the woods') that reads:

"Children please drive slowly" :o

All I can say is that you must have some very clever children up there, Sparky! :angry:

Lizzie :)

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Thank you Ally. I have already copied it and forwarded it on. Very good. Just what I needed this morning.

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....On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine :

"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication"

We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head colds off those bulldozers....

You may joke, Ally, but there's a road traffic sign (close to Sparky's 'neck of the woods') that reads:

"Children please drive slowly" :o

All I can say is that you must have some very clever children up there, Sparky! :angry:

Lizzie :)

Lizzie, you forgot the best one, it used to be on the road out side schools.

"Slow Children"

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Guest bearlover

On many plastic bags now days...This is not a toy. Or on a frozen food product. Remove from cartin before you bake!

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has anyone noticed the motorway signs in the uk that say 'slow down, spray' when it's raining?

do they think we can't SEE it?

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