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Stormy1952

Devotee

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Well......loads of food for thought..............

Cat has a good amount of points to be taken.... First off.... at any given point, there are a fairly large number of people who are reading these posts as guests, or annonymously. And I'm sure that they aren't all dev's.. Here would be a good time to bring point out a few things that Cat stated.

This site isn't absolutely secure.. It is up to you, as a memeber to proceed with caution. If you give out your email, personal info, etc to anyone, it is your responsibility. It is an extremely valid point about not posting pictures of yourself, your family, etc. on here except in your profile. Giving out email addresses is another.. I was taught years ago, to use a "throw away" email address. It works the same as screening telephone calls.. Then, if you chose to correspond with said person, you can give them the email address that you use on a daily basis.

We don't do background checks, fingerprints, and all that, Johnny does the best that he can to make sure a member of this forum isn't here for alterior motives.. There are people here who are not amputees. They are professionals, or spouses, or close family or friends of an amputee that have asked to join because they are looking for info for one reason or another. It's not 100%.

One more thought to chew on a bit... Remember the saying, you can't judge a book by it's cover? It is so true..........just because a person doesn't "march" to your drum, doesn't mean that they are bad, only different. To each his own. I have friends that are slightly different from me,( then again, they probably think I'm a lot different from them) but I would move heaven and earth to help/be there for them. Their preferences are theirs, and theirs alone. It's not for me to judge..only to be there for them as their friend. I might have questions, and I'd try to understand if I didn't, but I wouldn't/don't classify them as a devo or freak just because they are different than me. Those thoughts actually never occur to me. Would you classify a drug addict or alcoholic as a freak? Or try to figure out why they are a an addict or drunk?

It ultimately is each person's responsibility to be cautious enough for themselves and their own safety. Even if you are on the other side of a computer screen.

Hmmm...funny how mention 'professionals' but you keep ignoring what I'm saying, Higgy? :unsure:

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Oookaaay... This is getting interesting.......

I think we may actually be talking about several different things here. To that extent, I agree with Cat and Tammie that what a person "is" or "does" in their private lives with other consenting adults is nobody's business but their own. I also know that I, personally, would not want a relationship with someone who was interested in me solely because I have one short leg. I'm not sure HOW I'd feel if I learned that someone I found interesting, who was interested in me, found me somehow "more attractive" because of a missing limb... my best guess at this point would be "really confused!" I think my personal preference would be to have my amp status be a "neutral" issue in a relationship... however, I'm not sure that's entirely possible??

All of that being said, I do think there's a big difference between a dev or "admirer" encountering "us" on-line, pursuing us on-line, pursuing us in real life, and having a "professional relationship" which includes dealing with our prostheses and/or residual limbs. I also wonder if all of this might be seen differently by men and women!

Bear with me here, gang... there's a lot running 'round in my brain, here....

To use an analogy, I have not the slightest interest in what my doctors' political affiliation, religious beliefs, or sexual orientation may be, as long as their professional relationship with me is kept 100% professional and I feel I'm getting objective, quality care from them. Stray over that boundary of professionalism, however, and I'm outt'a there.

When it comes to a dev who works with amputees, there's a lot of room for misconduct. And THIS may be where men and women approach it with different mindsets....... I have a feeling that a guy can look at a dev who's acted inappropriately and just say "what a creep; I'm gone!" and not be as likely to take it as a "personal" thing, while we gals would have more of a tendency to feel that our trust had been violated and take it VERY personally. Or am I wrong here? What do you folks think?

I do think that "the dev issue" should be more openly discussed, both with new amps and with prosthetists-in-training. People do need to be aware and alert... just not to the point of paranoia.

When I lost my leg, not a single soul ever so much as mentioned the existance of devs to me: I discovered them when I started looking for a supportive online amp community. (For some reason, my initial searches took me to either professional sites for prosthetists or various dev hang-outs... both frustrating and disturbing!) Once I learned of their existance and mentioned this to the people who "should" have warned me, the response was, "Okay... now that you know, here's some information about it and here are some precautions you should take."

THAT, I think, is a definite flaw in the "training" of new amputees. We DON'T automatically know about this sort of thing (at least, I didn't!) and I think it would be good for the people who are charged with getting us back to a "normal" life to provide some kind of guidelines to the hazards attached to being an amputee in a world where devs and fetishists exist.

Okay, okay... I know I'm rambling, and I know that I'm usually pretty "verbose"... anyone want to try and match me for length-of-post?

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When I was younger, I never even thought of someone wanting to be with me because I am an amputee. I have never dated, been in a relationship or anything, like I said before. I just worry that some guy will be like 'oh I hear she's an amputee. I want to go out with her!' and me to really like him and then realize he just wants me because I only have one foot. I would love to marry a fellow amputee who knows what its like and has been through a similar situation as me.

I'm not even worrying about dating now so we will cross that road when we get there!

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THAT, I think, is a definite flaw in the "training" of new amputees. We DON'T automatically know about this sort of thing (at least, I didn't!) and I think it would be good for the people who are charged with getting us back to a "normal" life to provide some kind of guidelines to the hazards attached to being an amputee in a world where devs and fetishists exist.

Cherlym, I lost my leg on the 22nd of June, 1988, and did not begin talking with other amputees, until I joined this forum, on the 5th of October, 2005. I had no physical therapy or guidance on just how to walk on this doggone thing, let alone help with subject such as this. The first I ever heard of "dev's" or "wannabee's", was on this forum.

Like the old saying: "I've been to a barn raisn', a hog callin' and a county fair, but I've never seen/heard anything like this".

Most of what I have learned in life, I have had to learn the hard way - from experience. And believe me, I have not led a quiet life, and there has been much of this. I won't even begin to describe the "off beat", or "weirdo's" in life that I've encountered, so hearing of the amputee kind doesn't surprise me. Strangely though - to my knowledge - I have never met one with an affinity for amputees. If I were to however, I am sure that I would naturally handle it with my usuall aplomb and diplomatic delicacy. :lol: Every situation however - I have learned - has it own solution. There is no "one size fits all". We really don't "learn" all there is to know, but it develops pretty much "on the wing" as we go.

Like Ally once mentioned, I have had friends of one kind of persuasion, and have thrown out others of the same. It's not always "who" they are - but "what" they do. If they show me respect - I will usually return it. If not - well, I will return that also.

I like what you said here:

To use an analogy, I have not the slightest interest in what my doctors' political affiliation, religious beliefs, or sexual orientation may be, as long as their professional relationship with me is kept 100% professional and I feel I'm getting objective, quality care from them. Stray over that boundary of professionalism, however, and I'm outt'a there.

This pretty much apllies ot all situations. Like I said: "One size does not fit all". Even in this.

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When it comes to a dev who works with amputees, there's a lot of room for misconduct. And THIS may be where men and women approach it with different mindsets....... I have a feeling that a guy can look at a dev who's acted inappropriately and just say "what a creep; I'm gone!" and not be as likely to take it as a "personal" thing, while we gals would have more of a tendency to feel that our trust had been violated and take it VERY personally. Or am I wrong here? What do you folks think?

Cheryl I can guarantee I would take it VERY personally if the boundries were crossed.

I can't predict what order my emotions would run in, but the last one would be anger. I would have no hesitation in reporting him (or her) and, if necessary, I'd file sexual assault charges. It wouldn't matter how good he or she was at their job. Keep it professional or face the consequences.

I guess from my point of view I've had lots of practice at this kind of thing. Being the person I am means that I've been contacted by loads of people over the years who seek the kind of person I am. Most are harmless and just want to get to know you, others are more persistent and forceful and you learn early and quickly how to get rid of them. Discovering there were Dev's in the Amp community was no surprise to me, in fact when I first found out I thought.." Well of course there is, why would I think otherwise"

My concern would be Amps who don't have the strength or knowledge to do this. If you lose trust in the people making your legs where do you turn to? It's not like you run into prosthetists every day of the week.

That's why I think discussions like this are good. We can educate each other.

Be alert, be aware, be careful, but don't let it be your focus.

If we focus too much on this kind of thing you can allow yourself to be paralysed with fear. We have enough to overcome without worrying all the time who is looking at us or thinking about us.

By the way I think my post was longer than yours Cheryl :P .....You make better use of spaces :lol:

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Hmmm...funny how mention 'professionals' but you keep ignoring what I'm saying, Higgy? :unsure:

Lizzie, I think you have misunderstood me somewhere.. I was making a comment about people in general. As to the professionals that I was referring to specifically, I was talking about a friend of mine who happens to be a nurse, and deals with people on a cancer ward on a day to day basis.. That person is here for information, and to qet questions that they might have answered.

I wasn't ignoring, or dancing around anything you said. Believe me, if you knew me, you would know that is the last thing in the world that I am going to do.You can ask the 20 or so members of the forum who have met me personally. I didn't want to be blunt about it as it sounds as if you have had a MAJOR run in with a dev who was a prosthetist, and as you didn't want to mention details, which is your right, I didn't want to push it out in the front of the conversation making that particular thing the focus .I was trying to be tactful. What I do want, is for people to be aware of what can and does go on.The devo's aren't just in the prosthetic world. As Cheryl stated earlier, we don't go into this with full knowledge of the devo's in our world. At the time, we are sort of busy trying to cope with life. It isn't any different than living in a world with rapists, robbers, or murderer's. You have to have common sense and not ignore things. Sometimes, people get caught in bad situations, but it isn't the norm. I also agree that I think a man can say "I'm outta here" and a woman will feel so violated that it isn't funny.

If you think that I am "dodging" the statement because I'm a professional in the prosthetic world, sorry. I'm not.. I am however, a certified nurses aide in the field of medicine, and a tax professional. A professional at what I do. What I do want to do and I will reiterate it again, is make people understand that because they're in the safe confines of their house, meeting people on the internet, that they too, need to proceed with caution. Being safe at home, can quickly lead to not being safe when you step out your door. People who meet people on the internet do meet in real life. Devo's also hang out on the internet trying to meet people. Not everyone on this forum is over 18, and those were the ones that I was hoping to "gently" enlighten.

Please, feel free to pm me if you wish to further discuss my opinions specifically on this subject.

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I wasn't questioning you as professiional, Higgy, I was querying the fact that you seemed to have overlooked or even acknowledged my comment.

When I was badly treated I reported the person (several times, in fact) and after my final 'reporting' (several years later) he just stopped working at the clinic I was attending. It was a shame it took so long for someone to actually believe me! Especially when I encountered another lady (approx 30 years my senior, at the time) who just burst into tears when that 'professional' entered the fitting room. I was concerned and asked her what the matter was & to my horror I discovered that I wasn't the only person who had been treated badly by him. She unfortunately wasn't as brazen as me & didn't wish to compromise her treatment, so she didn't say anything.

Probably part of the reason why I was so snappy yesterday was because I felt that people were just glossing over, what I found to be an important issue and a violation of the patient - clinician relationship. You have explained that you were being tactful, Higgy, and I appreciate that very much...and if I caused you any upset, I apologise.

My message is that not all prosthetists are devs (far from it!) but that we should be aware of their existance and if something happens to you then please have the courage the speak out.

Lizzie :)

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Lizzie,

I didn't think you were questioning me professionally at all. And I didn't overlook it, I was saying something in a different direction. I think we both were aiming for the same thing. I however, was thinking of you and what you were implying. The situation that you were in is not the norm.

It's good that you are kind enough to open up and share what happened in the hopes that it would prevent someone else from having to deal with, or not knowing how to deal with, the same situation. Hopefully, it will prevent the same situation with someone else.. If he isn't in that clinic any longer, he very well may have moved on somewhere else.

No apology needed...

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Oookaaay... This is getting interesting.......

I think we may actually be talking about several different things here. To that extent, I agree with Cat and Tammie that what a person "is" or "does" in their private lives with other consenting adults is nobody's business but their own. I also know that I, personally, would not want a relationship with someone who was interested in me solely because I have one short leg. I'm not sure HOW I'd feel if I learned that someone I found interesting, who was interested in me, found me somehow "more attractive" because of a missing limb... my best guess at this point would be "really confused!" I think my personal preference would be to have my amp status be a "neutral" issue in a relationship... however, I'm not sure that's entirely possible??

All of that being said, I do think there's a big difference between a dev or "admirer" encountering "us" on-line, pursuing us on-line, pursuing us in real life, and having a "professional relationship" which includes dealing with our prostheses and/or residual limbs. I also wonder if all of this might be seen differently by men and women!

Bear with me here, gang... there's a lot running 'round in my brain, here....

To use an analogy, I have not the slightest interest in what my doctors' political affiliation, religious beliefs, or sexual orientation may be, as long as their professional relationship with me is kept 100% professional and I feel I'm getting objective, quality care from them. Stray over that boundary of professionalism, however, and I'm outt'a there.

When it comes to a dev who works with amputees, there's a lot of room for misconduct. And THIS may be where men and women approach it with different mindsets....... I have a feeling that a guy can look at a dev who's acted inappropriately and just say "what a creep; I'm gone!" and not be as likely to take it as a "personal" thing, while we gals would have more of a tendency to feel that our trust had been violated and take it VERY personally. Or am I wrong here? What do you folks think?

I do think that "the dev issue" should be more openly discussed, both with new amps and with prosthetists-in-training. People do need to be aware and alert... just not to the point of paranoia.

When I lost my leg, not a single soul ever so much as mentioned the existance of devs to me: I discovered them when I started looking for a supportive online amp community. (For some reason, my initial searches took me to either professional sites for prosthetists or various dev hang-outs... both frustrating and disturbing!) Once I learned of their existance and mentioned this to the people who "should" have warned me, the response was, "Okay... now that you know, here's some information about it and here are some precautions you should take."

THAT, I think, is a definite flaw in the "training" of new amputees. We DON'T automatically know about this sort of thing (at least, I didn't!) and I think it would be good for the people who are charged with getting us back to a "normal" life to provide some kind of guidelines to the hazards attached to being an amputee in a world where devs and fetishists exist.

Okay, okay... I know I'm rambling, and I know that I'm usually pretty "verbose"... anyone want to try and match me for length-of-post?

I agree with you completely.Judy H

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This is an interesting discussion, and I think it is important to try and give "newbies" a well-balanced view and a gentle word of warning.

Jim, I've been thinking about your comments to me, because I think we only partially disagree here and I want to express it clearly.

You're mentioned before that you were basically "on your own" as far as assistance or training when you lost your leg, and that you've gotten where you have in life by your own determination. Good for you! I think that's admirable, and I think it's something each and every one of us needs to do to a large extent. However, here's where I disagree:

I don't think that receiving help and advice negates "doing it on your own." To use an extreme example as an illustration, you've also said that you trust your CPO's professional expertise and his recommendations on components would carry great weight with you. If you were to take your "do it on your own" theory to its most extreme (I know you wouldn't, but bear with me here!), you wouldn't be listening to your CPO: you'd be out in the workshop, building a foot from scratch! You might even make a good one... but it makes it easier and more dependable for you to accept advice from someone who's trained in that area.

When it comes to the "dev" issue, I truly believe that it's in the amputee's favor if he/she learns about it from a trusted professional (or another, supportive amputee)... and that they learn about it early-on, as soon as they start to feel up to tackling the business of living an active life as an amp. It doesn't negate their need to "learn how to handle it themselves," nor does it try to give them a "one size fits all" solution to the problem. It DOES give them a chance to know about it and think about it before the first time it happens to them, so they're not taken completely by surprise!

My introduction to devs was utterly unexpected: I ventured into what was billed as an "amputee support organization's" chat room... and smack into the middle of a group of devs discussing "what turned them on" in a very graphic manner. No... I did NOT stay there! I beat a VERY hasty retreat... but it left me frightened and confused, and I wish I'd at least known aobut the existance of such people and places in advance, so I would have had some idea of what I'd just found and that it was NOT a normal response to amputees.

Does that make sense to you guys?

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Jim, I've been thinking about your comments to me, because I think we only partially disagree here and I want to express it clearly.

Good Morning Cherlym. From my viewpoint, I don't see that we disagree at all. Different viewpoints - possibly, but disagree - never. :lol:

You're mentioned before that you were basically "on your own" as far as assistance or training when you lost your leg, and that you've gotten where you have in life by your own determination. Good for you! I think that's admirable, and I think it's something each and every one of us needs to do to a large extent. However, here's where I disagree:

I was on my own - not by choice. My insurance illegaly cancelled me after the operation (after 15 years of paying without a single claim), just because they thought (rightly) that I would have more operations. So, the hospital refused therapy, and by the time I made the insurance company live up to their "One year notice for cancellation without cause - clause", I had learned to walk on my own and didn't need the therapy.

Also, there were no support groups in our area, and I didn't know how to operate a computer at that time, so I wasn't aware of forums like this (if there were any). Had there been any groups, or forums, I would have gladly embraced them as I am now, but as it was, my wife and I had to go it alone. (As we have much in our lives.)

I don't think that receiving help and advice negates "doing it on your own." To use an extreme example as an illustration, you've also said that you trust your CPO's professional expertise and his recommendations on components would carry great weight with you. If you were to take your "do it on your own" theory to its most extreme (I know you wouldn't, but bear with me here!), you wouldn't be listening to your CPO: you'd be out in the workshop, building a foot from scratch! You might even make a good one... but it makes it easier and more dependable for you to accept advice from someone who's trained in that area.

I ALWAYS listen to advice. Whether I take it or not depends on whether I agree with it or not. I don't care whose idea it is - mine or someone elses - I will do it the best way that I see. I have no ego problem - there.

As for making the foot myself - believe me, I would, if I couldn't find one on the market that was to my liking. That is what I did with the shower protector. I didn't like what was available, so I went out to my shop and designed and built my own. That is my way. However, I am very fortunate that there are some very good prosthetic feet out there to chose from.

As for taking the advice of my CPO, I also take the advice of my doctor, and the pilot of the plane I am on, and the driver of the car I am in. This in no way negates my "maverick" personality.

There is an old saying: "EITHER LEAD - FOLLOW - OR GET OUT OF THE WAY". I am definitely not a follower in life, but I will walk side by side with someone If I agree with where they are going. A follower NEEDS a leader. I don't. I am also not a leader. A leader - to me - NEEDS a following. Again, I don't. I am perfectly willing to walk my direction on my own. Now, if others like the way that I am going, and want to walk side by side with me - and some want to follow - then fine, just don't get in my way.

In short - I "march to my own drummer" -pretty much. :rolleyes:

When it comes to the "dev" issue, I truly believe that it's in the amputee's favor if he/she learns about it from a trusted professional (or another, supportive amputee)... and that they learn about it early-on, as soon as they start to feel up to tackling the business of living an active life as an amp. It doesn't negate their need to "learn how to handle it themselves," nor does it try to give them a "one size fits all" solution to the problem. It DOES give them a chance to know about it and think about it before the first time it happens to them, so they're not taken completely by surprise!

We amputees, do not have a monopoly on the "weirdos" of this world. I raised our children with the admonition of: "Keep your eyes open - it's a jungle out there". EVERYWHERE - IN ALL WALKS OF LIFE. To single out a special education just for the amputee ones, would be "whistling in the wind". Then we would have to have special educations for this one - and that one. All of us on this program are at least at the age to hold a meaningful conversation here, which tells me that we all must have some experiences in life in general, and a certain maturity. Sure, the very fact of "weirdos" (for lack of a better word right now), surronding us in our daily lives, should always be at the front of our mind. People have all kinds of fetishes. An amputee may only think of the amputee "dev's", but what about the ones that .........say, like red hair - or the ones that like really short people - or tall people - or heavy set people - or ones in uniform - or out of uniform, and on, and on, and on, and on. There is no stopping once we get started.

The point that I am trying to make is that life is full of fetishes, and we have to look outside of our strictly "amputee" mentality, and be on the guard for all of them. This is life. Instructions should start with our children as they grow up, and not wait until there is an amputation to start making people aware of the ........."weirdo's" in our midst, (Again, for the lack of a better word).

Does that make sense to you guys?

You always make sense Cherlym, which is why I enjoy our "discussions". Disagree? Absolutely not! We just may see the same things from different angles on occasion - that's all - and like you said - saying the sme thing.....in a different way - perhaps?

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Guest bearlover

......... He has to love me for me and treat me like the queen I am :)

Good for you. Now that sounds like a level headed lady who knows her own worth. If you don't believe in yourself - how can anyone else.

Exactly. And thank you. I will never settle for less than the best. My mother has always made sure I knew what I was worth and not to be with anyone who doesn't appreciate me.

In return you must treat him well and respect him too. Its a 2 way street!

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Exactly. And thank you. I will never settle for less than the best. My mother has always made sure I knew what I was worth and not to be with anyone who doesn't appreciate me.

In return you must treat him well and respect him too. Its a 2 way street!

Absolutely - because I don't think that either of you would want a man that didn't know his worth also. Like K said - "It's a two way street". That's why my wife and I have been a "team" for 49 years in November. It's called "mutual respect". It's more than a marriage - it's a partnership.......an equal partnership. I look after her interests - and she looks after mine. And no.... we haven't sacrificed any of our independence or individuality. We are still ourselves - together.

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Guest bearlover

:) Exactely Jim! My husband and I are the same way..We just celebrated 12 years together and have known each other 15 years..We are true soul mates! :wub:

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Exactly. And thank you. I will never settle for less than the best. My mother has always made sure I knew what I was worth and not to be with anyone who doesn't appreciate me.

In return you must treat him well and respect him too. Its a 2 way street!

Absolutely - because I don't think that either of you would want a man that didn't know his worth also. Like K said - "It's a two way street". That's why my wife and I have been a "team" for 49 years in November. It's called "mutual respect". It's more than a marriage - it's a partnership.......an equal partnership. I look after her interests - and she looks after mine. And no.... we haven't sacrificed any of our independence or individuality. We are still ourselves - together.

That is so great Jim! Congratulations!

My gradnparents have been together for 48 years I think. 4 kids, 9 grandkids, and 9 grand-dogs later, they are still very happy.

I would never want a man who didn't know his worth. I also don't want one who is cocky either. A happy medium would be nice.

:) Exactely Jim! My husband and I are the same way..We just celebrated 12 years together and have known each other 15 years..We are true soul mates! :wub:

aww! Congrats to you too!

My last/first/longest 'relationship' was in 6th grade (5 years ago). His name was jordan and he passed me a note that said 'will you go out with me?'. We never actually 'went out'. It was not different than before he asked me out. We were siting in class, about a day later, and he mouthed the words 'I love you'. I was the what the heck? We are in 6th grade you idiot and have been going out for a day. I just smiled and nodded. I mean, what do you say to that? I didn't want to lie to the kid!

We broke up a few days later. He was 'cheating' on me so I dumped him.

Thats my dating life thus far. Exciting huh? :lol:

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Guest bearlover

Shelby, You have your whole life ahead of you...Just be a kid and enjoy life...You have a lot of school left. Beleive it or not time goes by very fast...Someday a very lucky man will come into your life. You have much to offer someone..right now have fun enjoy your youth!!

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Just to add my own very personal opinion regarding devs being CP's......

It would just creep me out completely. I don't think I would go to a CP who was a devotee (not that anyone would ever admit to this in their profession). Remember folks, the attraction to amputees is sexually driven. Yip, it IS. Even if they made the best legs in the business, it would still make me feel uncomfortable at some level.

<_<

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I don't think I would go to a CP who was a devotee (not that anyone would ever admit to this in their profession).

The how would you know? :rolleyes:

If they were looking not touching and being discrete.....how would you know?

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:huh::blink: :o I was afraid someone would say that!!!!!!!

EEEEEK................ :lol:

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Actually, I have spoken with a number of devs who have gone into 'disabled' professions specifically because of their attraction to PWD's. If one has to think about the postive side of this, we land up with a handful of people who really do care, and will literally bend over backwards to make our lives easier. Because they do, after all, really have a passion to see us doing well.

:)

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At one time or another through out life, I have run into dev's of one sort or another in almost every walk of life. From the time that I was 10 1/2, and had a gardening "business", to the clasrooms - in the army - in construction - and in the corporate boardroom. To think that this is an isolated problem with only amputees is both naive and ill informed. If all dev's ( of any kind) were all of a sudden colored red, we would be amazed as we go about our daily lives. THEY ARE AMONGST US - EVERYWHERE.

I know one in particular who is the deacon of a church and a former bank president. Another who was a chef in a resturant, and another who is in everyday home delivery. (These examples are just to name a very few that I have run across, since my first encounter at 10 1/2 while mowing lawns. - Oh yes, I almost forgot about the one in the orpahnage when I was just under 5)) I am not saying which way that their deviation leans, but as Ally said, all have different interests, but they all have a basis in sexuality, and their interests are not puritanical.

Sooooooo - are they in the amputee arena? You bet your seet bippy (as the saying goes - and I haven't the slightest idea what a "bippy" is :lol: ), but to single them out and then feel that you have won is ....... again, naive.

Oh yes - most all that I have encountered (knowingly) have their own groups and organizations - web sites, and some even magazines. We are all being "watched" almost daily, in one form or another. Now - the touchy, feely part is obvious, and the extreme answer is a right hook to the jaw (metaphorically speaking, of course), but I leaned the word NO at an early age.

I am always polite, (at least I try ) - until it is time ...... not to be polite.

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Jim, I don't think anyone here disputes that there's a variety of devotees for just about any number of things... and I don't think anyone's saying that we shouldn't be aware of that. What I'm hearing, though, is that this is a forum for amputee issues... and that devs who focus their attention on amps ARE an amputee issue... one that may not have occurred to a new amputee.

"Harp" on it...? No. Be aware of it...? ABSOLUTELY. And if giving some new amp a "heads up" about it helps increase awareness, it's well worth the time it takes to do so.

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Jim, I don't think anyone here disputes that there's a variety of devotees for just about any number of things... and I don't think anyone's saying that we shouldn't be aware of that. What I'm hearing, though, is that this is a forum for amputee issues... and that devs who focus their attention on amps ARE an amputee issue... one that may not have occurred to a new amputee.

"Harp" on it...? No. Be aware of it...? ABSOLUTELY. And if giving some new amp a "heads up" about it helps increase awareness, it's well worth the time it takes to do so.

:rolleyes: Ooooookay. <_< I agree? What I am trying to say however, is that one should not be so surprised that they are here - and some seem to be. That's all.

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Jim, I don't think anyone here disputes that there's a variety of devotees for just about any number of things... and I don't think anyone's saying that we shouldn't be aware of that. What I'm hearing, though, is that this is a forum for amputee issues... and that devs who focus their attention on amps ARE an amputee issue... one that may not have occurred to a new amputee.

"Harp" on it...? No. Be aware of it...? ABSOLUTELY. And if giving some new amp a "heads up" about it helps increase awareness, it's well worth the time it takes to do so.

Oh, I love you, Cheryl :wub: , as you always seem to say the right thing. :)

I grew up with my prostheses and although a friend at school had, very briefly, mentioned something to me about 'amputee devs' (she'd didn't know what they were called & she'd read something about a few of them in some magazine :unsure:), I'd no idea that a very ill mannered one would encroach on my prosthetic treatment. <_<

I prefer someone to like me for who I am and not what I am, but then again, each to their own. I certainly think that, whatever your sexual preference, it shouldn't interfere with a professional relationship...a relationship of trust.

Lizzie :)

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I had never heard of amputee devs until, like a lot of others, while searching on line for info, I came across this strange thing. Odd as it is, it doesn't bother me as much as the "wannabes". That really creeps me out.

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