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Lynne

Amputee female soldier

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Thanks for posting the link Lynne ,

I can’t say that I really know if it is different for you ladies simply because: -

A) We are all different

B) We men don’t have the same pressure on us to” look good or fit in” that society puts on you ladies.

c) I think it all boils down to the individual on how they see themselves and the impact that it has on there lives.

But from my limited exposure to the amp community I do think that purely on the cosmetic point of view it is more of an issue to you ladies , where as it seems to be more of a practical thing for us men .

Waiting for some one to prove me wrong . :biggrin:

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Well, from this gal's point of view, I was basically concerned that I just had a leg that "worked"...no matter what it looked like. However, I've always had a quite realistic looking cosmesis as well! And I had plenty of family and friends (mostly female) who were very concerned about what my leg would look like. So yeah, I think there may be more of a concern about "looking good and fitting in" with female amps.

I know that everyone just "assumed" that I would have a cosmesis for my leg...all during the conversations leading up to my decision to amputate, as well as in the preliminary appointments for the fittings on my first leg, everyone (and I do mean EVERYONE) in my CPO's office kept assuring me that my leg would "look normal." When I'd reply that this was a nice thing, but I'd really rather just be sure it worked well, my comments were basically glossed over. It turns out that my leg guys do some truly fine cosmesis work to cover legs that work VERY well, so everyone ended up happy. And I've just continued on wearing a cosmesis ever since.

But, unlike the woman in the story, I never had a problem going out legless in my wheelchair or feeling that I couldn't do something because of my appearance. Looking at some of the comments that followed the story, I wonder if part of the problem could have been with perceptions about HOW she came to lose her leg. Not just from outsiders, but from her own perceptions as well...her being a mother seems to be a major point of everyone's focus, and having to admit that she "put herself" in a "dangerous position" may have made the adjustment harder for her. But, in reality, no-one would have been likely to fault her husband if HE had been the one to put HIMself in that same position.

I'm not a mother, so I have no experience there at all...it may well make a difference. Any moms who'd like to weigh in on this issue??

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Thanks for posting Lynne, interesting discussion, I think I chatted to this lady on one or other of the forums prior to her surgery, so glad everything worked out alright for her.

Just looking at Mick and Cheryl's comments and what Cheryl said about being a mother and whether it made a difference .... I'm a mum, but was an amputee before I was a mum so not sure if that makes a difference.

I do have a cosmesis on my legs, but when I had my very first legs back in the 70's they looked very unlike actual legs, in fact I couldn't even wear shoes, the feet were black rocker shaped bits of wood, and the actual leg was a black metal frame with a sort of felt socket and leather corsets with loads of straps. I probably wore this leg for a year or so, it was actually brilliant getting you mobile but they did make you very noticeable, so it was wonderful to get given my next set of legs that were pink painted metal, but that I could wear a pair of shoes and normal trousers once again .... society then had a very different attitude to disabilities, so I think legs that looked like legs gave me the opportunity to get on with being 'me' instead of being noticed just for 'the legs' ... as it had been previously.

I am a mum to three children, now all grown up, and, in the years that they were growing up in, I think it probably made it easier for them to have a mum who kind of blended in with other mums ... in those days though there wasn't a choice regards cosmesis, legs or components ... you got what you were given. So that's the way its continued really, my cosmeses are only foam, and have been varying shapes over the years with different legs, but they do the job ok, actually people don't really tend to notice that much, I don't think unless they look closely, I once had a time when some of the black oily stuff leaked out the rubbers in the foot and someone was concerned that 'I had a nasty bruise on my foot'!

On balance, I think I prefer having the cosmesis but its probably just what I am used to. It probably is different for us girls than it is for men, I mean we spend ages getting our hair right, putting on the make up, choosing the clothes etc. etc. so imagine we probably would rather that was noticed first.

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Yes, it is interesting.

I think for the majority of women it is important what their legs look like.

Until I read the story I hadn't really appreciated it from a mothers point of view and the implications for their children, guess this applies to the fathers too. And come to think of it partners too.

Does having an amputee parent who does not have a cosmesis effect them in any way? Not something I had really thought about.

The story also highlights the importance of being able to get on with her life, looking after her kids ect. I seem to remember she had a struggle to get to Selly oak to have the amputation and had put up with pain for quite some time.

In the six years I have been an aka I have never had a cosmesis because I have never been fitted properly and not reached the stage where any leg made for me would be ready to be covered.

That may change soon as I have a test socket at home at the moment which is looking the best yet as far as fit goes. Now I face the dilemma of whether to have it covered or not. It has never bothered me before, I wear trousers all the time and shorts in summer. I don't mind the techno look of an above knee and have had laminated sockets made in the past, just a pity I never got to wear them....they looked good though......lol.

May be I will not have a cosmesis until I am sure of the fit, I will shrink down once I get the chance to use a socket and will need recasting anyway.

Any way if you are reading this Hanna, good on you for getting the story in the press.

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Lynne, I'm glad to hear that you may be making progress on getting a properly fitted leg! Hope this one turns out well!

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Thanks Cherylm,

Don't think I'll ever be pain free but at least I might be upright some of the time.

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In the six years I have been an aka I have never had a cosmesis because I have never been fitted properly and not reached the stage where any leg made for me would be ready to be covered.

That may change soon as I have a test socket at home at the moment which is looking the best yet as far as fit goes.

I hope that it works out for you this time,

Remember give me a call when you fancy a small walk somewhere and want some company,

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Hope it works out for you, Lynne. You've waited too long as it is! Wishing you all the best. :smile:

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