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Heather Mills - Amputee Forum
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Looking for support (for daughter)

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Oh, this is exciting...! One of my favorite things about this forum is when we can provide the means for people facing "unusual" situations to get together and just be able to talk with someone who is in the same situation! I mean, my problem (left BKA) is hardly unusual in the amp world and it still was an important event for me when I first met another BKA...when you're dealing with a genuine challenge, and you can compare notes with someone else, it can be really great. I hope that Lauren and Tisha can meet up in Tucson!

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Hi Everyone! It's been a crazy few weeks here, with some travel and family commitments. Lauren is doing well, and is getting ready to wrap up the semester at school. It's hard to believe that the year is basically done for her - and that it's been a year since she lost her arms. The amount of progress that she has made is remarkable - A year ago, we would have never imagined that she'd be back at school and doing even the simplest things for herself, and yet, thanks to hard work and an amazing attitude, Lauren has excelled. She still needs plenty of assistance, of course, but the progress has been amazing as she's really learned to use her feet and even her mouth.

I have told Lauren about the event and about Tisha. I'm sure that once the semester is over, she will reach out. I agree - Meeting others who are in a similar situation (which for Lauren and Tisha, is very rare) is such a valuable thing.

All the best,

Marion

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Hi Marion and Lauren,

I am excited to meet both of you. I am not sure how much correspondence you get from the Amputation Coalition, but their news letter came across my desk today and there is a whole program for upper limb loss--first time this has been offered in the seven or eight years. This is the web page. I do hope you will learn lots and have fun--the first meeting I went to I could not believe how much fun it was and what a more positive I left with.

http://www.amputee-coalition.org/upper-limb-session-track-at-amputee-coalition-2015-national-conference/?utm_source=Amputee+Coalition+|+eNews&utm_campaign=af32041a11-limbline_vol05_iss05&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_3201b4f9ce-af32041a11-56439661

I hope this is helpful

Peace, Beth Marie and my faithful and adorable companion Mariah (my Service dog).

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Tisha uses certain tools to help her. I've made a few and have ideas for others. I'll be bringing them with us to show some others there, so if you guys go, i'll be glad to show them to you and if she can use them, you can have the extra one's we have.

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Hi,

I definitely going to Tucson and rooming with Cheryl

See you there.

Peace,Beth Marie

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Hi All,

I hope you're all doing great! We are in the process of trying to make the schedule work to attend the conference in Tucson. Lauren is doing a a summer program at NYU here in New York for a few weeks to get her back on track in terms of credits for college from when she had the accident, so we are just trying to work it out so that she doesn't miss any necessary days. We expect to hear back within the next day or two.

Lauren officially finished the semester! Words simply can't express how proud of her we truly are. This has been the most trying year of our lives by far, but she's persevered and has made an enormous amount of progress. It's really hard to believe that one year ago, she was 100% completely dependent on others for even the simplest of tasks, and now she's able to write, eat, and excel in college, with just minimal assistance. I thank this whole group as well for all of the support and words of encouragement.

Lauren has been relaxing a bit since she got home from school, and has really enjoyed being back with her closest friends, and of course, her sister. While she of course sill has her difficult days, they're getting less frequent, and I think she's moved past the "grief" stage and has accepted that this is the new normal. I really credit her going back to school and trying to get back into a normal routine for that progress. I also think that having a really good set of cosmetic arms has helped her self confidence in those sticky social situations as well. We had a visit with the Dr. and the prosthetist last week, and thankfully, everything is good on the health side, and her stumps have really healed very nicely. Certainly most, if not all of the scarring is gone, and the medication has really helped her phantom pains and sensations. While she's still not a good candidate for prosthetics, that day is getting closer thanks to all of the technological advances. It's amazing.

I will keep you all updated as we make our plan for AZ - We are really, really trying to get there.

All the best,

Marion

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I'm really pleased she is doing so well - and just as importantly, how are you?! It can be so hard on the family and she is a lucky young woman to have so much support, but we all know that the worry can take its toll on the family. You sound so positive and I hope you are looking after yourself as well as you are looking after Lauren. Best wishes and congratulations to Lauren from the UK on passing another milestone in recovery!

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I was glad to hear how fantastically Lauren did this last semester--give her a big whopee!!!! I really want to meet both of you in Tucson. This year the conference has the most programming on arm loose, so I think it would be ideal for both of you. However, if Lauren can't make it, is there a chance you could come without her? I am happy for both of you! Lauren you are great!

Peace, Beth Marie

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Hello Everyone,

I hope you are all doing well. My apologies for going "off the grid" here. It's been a bit of a tough time. Sadly, my dear mother passed away suddenly following a heart attack, about 4.5 weeks ago. It was quite a shock, as my mother had always been in perfect health and was as sharp and as "with it" as an 86 year old could possibly be. I've been back and forth between NY and Florida to be with my father (who is, so thankfully, in great shape) and to help him deal with her affairs.

Lauren took "G-Mommy's" passing especially hard, as my mother was one of her biggest cheerleaders in the days and months following her amputations. Lauren would call my parents from college at least twice a week to check in and to keep them updated on her progress, and I know my mom would look forward to those calls. Lauren made an absolutely beautiful eulogy at the funeral.

It's been an incredibly tough time for our family, but Lauren continues to be a rock - And to be my rock. Her strength and courage is what gets me thru all of this.

With love and blessings to all,

Marion

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Hi Marion and Lauren,

I am so sorry for the death of your mom and G-mom. Death leaves such a gapping hole in life. My grandmother did a lot of raising me and making life sane--when she died I felt that hole.

Please take all the time you need to truly mourn this loss. Be good to yourselves and cherish all the memories that she made with you.

Peace and love, Beth Marie

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All I can do is to second Johnny's and BethMarie's sentiments...you and the rest of your family are in my thoughts and prayers...........

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Hi Everyone,

I hope you're all doing well. I truly appreciate the well wishes. It means so much. Things are slowly but surely getting back to normal around here, which is good - Being busy makes it easier.

Lauren is now back at school. It's amazing that just a year ago, we were so unsure of how she'd do, but now, one year later, she's excelling. She was very excited to get back to her friends and her routine, and since she took summer classes, she's back up to pace with her peers. She continues to have 24/7 help at school, which is so helpful for her, even as she has become more independent. After my mother's passing, Lauren spent a lot of time with us and her sister, and just spent time relaxing. I think she needed it, and she seemed energized as we left her back at school. I know that she's going to have a great year! She continues to make strides physically, as her phantom pain has gotten a lot better, and as her feet and legs have gotten stronger. I know that Lauren still misses the way things were, but she's so good at just continuing to adapt. The hot, humid weather in NY (and now back at school) has made it tough for her to wear her cosmetic arms, so she has been going without them, which I think has made her a bit more comfortable in her own skin. Every day, it gets easier it seems.

I hope everyone has a great long weekend... And thanks again for all of the support.

Best,

Marion

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Hi Everyone,

I hope everyone is having a great Fall! Here in NY, the weather is finally getting a bit cooler, which is a nice change.

Some exciting news -- Lauren is officially dating!! She met a wonderful young gentleman named James in one of her classes at school, and they seem to have hit it off. Lauren was surprised that he took such an interest in her, but he seems to be genuinely interested in her for who she is, arms or no arms. They went on a few dates, and Lauren just seems so happy. She called me up so excited the other day to tell us all about it. They went to a movie the other night, and he even held her foot like one might hold hands. Lauren's exact words were that he makes her feel so normal. I think that the fact that she see that she can still be attractive (even physically) is going to be a major, major step forward for Lauren. It was so exciting to here how excited she was on the phone that I just had to share the update.

Everything else is going well -- She's doing well at school, and continuing to adapt and grow.

All the best,

Marion

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Hi Marion,

I am delighted that Lauren has found somebody special--she has done so very well that I was sure this would happen for her. Give her my love--really missed you in Tucson for the conference.

Peace, Beth Marie

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That's wonderful news, Marion...I'm glad things are going so well for Lauren! I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to meet both of you in Tucson, but it sounds like Lauren is coming along just fine!

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Hi Everyone,

So sorry for the long lag in posting... I hope everyone is doing well and having a fantastic holiday season!

Everything here is status quo -- Which is to say that things are getting better for Lauren every day. She continues to really adapt and figure things out on a daily basis using a combination of her feet and her mouth, and is slowly but surely becoming more independent. Her confidence is also improving on a daily basis. Lauren did quite well in school this semester, and it has been great having her home for the holiday break! With the incredibly warm weather that we've had in NY, she hasn't even had to abandon her flip flops -- Which, of course, makes life easier. She's been spending time with her friends and her sister, and is taking a very well deserved break. Things continue to go well on the dating front for her, which is such good news.... That unto itself has been an amazing help for her confidence and self worth.

Just wanted to send a quick update. I hope everyone has a very happy, healthy new year, and we are definitely looking forward to coming to the next conference this coming year!

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hey there...sorry I've been mia from this thread. We missed ya at the conference, it was a blast so hopefully this year you guys can make it. Tisha lost her dressing stick of 15yrs when we were traveling so I'm making her some new ones. That got me thinking of some other tools to make for her and some of our other armless friends. If she wants, I can make some for her as well. Tisha mainly uses just one stick. it's just a simple metal stick about 20" long covered with a rubber grip that has a small hook at the end. She can use that for buttoning clothes and using zippers. I still have no idea how she can manipulate that thing as well as she does! lol. Anyway, ask her and if she wants some just message me.

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Hi All,

I trust you're all doing well! I know it has been such a long time since I have posted here - It's been crazy! Lots happening on the family and work fronts, and things are now just starting to settle down.

Lauren is continuing to make progress and is doing very well, especially as she's starting to wrap up the semester at school. She has really continued to adapt and find new, innovative ways to regain her independence. It isn't always easy, of course, but I think she's found that she can do so many of the things she did before - albeit differently. Her progress continues to inspire everyone who interacts with her. 

I know this is a short update, but I will make an effort to post more frequently again. 

With all the best wishes,

Marion

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Quick updates are just fine, Marion...they mean that life is "getting back to normal."  So glad that Lauren is continuing to expand her horizons!

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Hi Everyone,

 

I hope you're all doing great! Just a quick update here to let everyone know that Lauren is continuing to do very well.

 

She's home from college now for the summer of course, and it's been great having her back! She has definitely been relaxing, and has been keeping busy seeing her friends, hanging with her sister, and even taking some fitness and yoga classes. It's amazing to see her really resume the life she lead before the amputations. Things definitely have to be done differently, and often take more time and require help, but she's living - Rather than crying and feeling sorry for herself all the time. There are still definitely down moments, but it's been a remarkeable shift in Lauren's outlook, and I am proud beyond words at how well she's adjusting. Her legs and feet really do most of the work, and her flexibility has gotten even better - I guess that's one perk of being so athletic even before the accident! Lauren also has been using voice activation technology, as well as a mouthstick, to use the computer and iPad. She continues to wear her cosmetic arms when she goes out to nice restaurants and for special occasions, but now that it's getting so hot and sticky here in NY, she's been going without them more often - They get very heavy and uncomfortable for her.

I hope everyone here is enjoying the summer - And I have a bunch of pictures that I'm going to download from my phone here in the next day or so that I'll post!

 

All the best,

Marion

 

 

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Good to hear from you, Marion!  I'm glad that Lauren seems to be figuring out her new life.  Sounds like it will be a good one for her...and all the rest of the family!

Pics would be wonderful, if you get around to it!

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This is a recent very empowering story that made me think of you and your daughter. So I decided to share it with all of the forum following your thread. I hope that you enjoy watching it as much as I did.

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