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cazzy1

'Intimate relations'....

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MJ, you are soooo right, we do find our soul mates in the least likely places, when we least expect it and to me, that's what makes it so special. :ph34r:

Sheila LBK

Southern Maine USA

Keep Smiling :)

It is better to have failed at the attempt, than to have never tried.

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Soul mates :

I lay in bed and try to sleep

i lay in bed and tears i weep

i found my soul mate and i knew

forover we we'ed live just us two

i had this cll that came from a far

it came from a distance shined like a star

i see in colors see it clear

i see my soul mate so very near

and as i sleep and lay in bed

i see my mate clearly in my head

and as i dream of love and life

my love i etched deeper than the cut of a knife

so as i close my eyes and try and sleep

my soul mate will forever my heart keep

post-17-1089922226.jpg

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Hi cazzy,

I became an aka when i was 20 and I remember thinking about how I would find a mate and how I would go about having sex as well. My first time, I was wearing a temp and I was in a lot of pain. I tried having sex with it on, but it did get in the way and was painful. But he was understanding and I took it off. That was the last time I had sex with my leg on. But I am sure that the type of leg you use (BK or AK) will affect you comfrot level in taht area.

Later I became a non user(Dr. Orders) and that brought about a different twist . Becasue I couldn't cover up the amputation anymore. It is just there, and I know it makes people uncomfortable especially men. So the umm Frequency

has diminished but I think it also has saved me the hassle of dealing with men who couldn't have handled my amp in the long run. I also do agree with the others satement about keeping in good shape and taking care of yourself.

It may take a little onger to find the right guy but you won't have to kiss as many frogs. One thing I have found is that the more comfortable yI am about having sex with a new person, the more comfortable they will be.

Unique

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Hi All,

We have a wonderful, passionate sex life. Wether ther leg is on or off really doesn't matter. I actually prefer it off, but sometimes there's not enough time......errrrr.......like i said....it's passionate.

I have a wonderful partner, we have been married 21 years and the flame still burns bright.

Cat

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It has been a very powerfull past few days , very passionate but i think i found the answwr or at least thee what i see as being the answer to what love is or more rightly , where love is .

Love is not just this feeling but an energy that floats around us , through us and enters into our very deepest part of our souiuuls as we float freely . It engulfs us and wraps us into it;s grasp and dosn't let go .

I must confess though that there is one thing that really REALLLLy makes me mad .Because i have waaaay bad ADD and dylsexia , i will ofet not be able to either find the word i need tio say or say something that has the wrong meaning ... even if i KNOW what i want to say .I would really want to know how i can get around the wrong words because it is like sooooooo waaaaaaaayyy stressfull to be mis understood sometimes .... even though it's not intenentional .

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MJ,

The problem with words is that sometimes they do tend to limit the feelings one has to express love which is one of the most powerful emotions we have.

You are able to define what you feel perfectly in what you have written in these posts so I wouldn’t worry about it at all.

I’m sure the person you are writing about feels this energy too and completely understands what you are expressing. :)

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I did wonder, if my husband would still fancy me. I kept putting the moment off, until, Well lets just say i was really in the mood!!!!! It did not bother him at all. I told him how i had been feeling and he just told me "that he loved me ,and he could not see why i would be worried" So much for the stress i put my self under.

Michelle

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Now I'm an official member of the club I can confirm that we varified there was no problems one and half weeks after having the amp!

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Man do I love you guys!!!!! :P I have had my leg pretty much since birth. I was born with one leg much shorter then the other . From a small child a ajusted well. I never had body issues until the past couple of years. I don't know really where it is coming from, maybe from the fact that I haven't had a b/f in a few years and I only seem to be meeting jerks would make a big deal about my leg. But I keep holding on to the fact that there is someone out there for everyone, and it's not like I have ever had a b/f so there are people who can get over the fact that I am missing a leg. I mean even "normal people" have problems meeting someone.

You guys have just given me so much support and have let me know it is ok to feel what I am feeling and that other people feel what I am feeling. So thank you all :D

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A big WOOHOO for you June :D .....Way to go.

Jamie Lee, "Normal" people have as many problems as we do and often more. It's just that ours are right there in the open for everyone to see.

The right person for you will see past what you look like and see your soul as you will see their soul.

Every person is beautiful in some way.

Cat

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Hiyya CAT , you make a waay great point about so called normal peoples who ahvee more probs if not morerer than we do sometimes . I was always wondering though what is the REAL meanin g of " normal " and just who decides for the rest of us just what is in fact " normal " . I think that LOVE is LOVE and it makes no differeance who thinks what because , no one has the right to decide for us who we should love and how . Far too many people are so waaay concerened about being " accepted " that they sell out who they are just so that they can fit in with the crowds .

So , here is one thing i try to live by : " believe in myself "

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OMG MJ you sound just like me-'define normal' is one of my better known rhetorical catchphrases :lol:

Harhar June, great to hear your twinkly-eyed revelations-go get 'im tiger :)

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Hiyya CAZZY , yaaa , i ahte even the usse of thee word " normal " becaus ee it is just anothe word that i think means nothing . wait , sorry , i'm wrong , it does mean something , " normal " is a word for those wwho would rather follow inl oine and be just like what everyone expcets of tehm rather than take a huge risk and dare to be differant . I think KAZ said it best some time ago qwhen she suggested thsat too may people are like a bunch of trained seals who will preform as per there " training " . YUUUUUUUUUUK . One of my most im portant moto's that i live by and live my whole life by is :

DARE TO BE DIFFERANT

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It's very interesting to see how many 'views' there have been on this topic. It just goes to show we all have the same thing on our mind most of the time. Or are people out there look for some sort of answer!!!!! :P :P :P :unsure:

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Hero's by David Bowie :

I, I will be king

And you, you will be queen

Though nothing will drive them away

We can beat them, just for one day

We can be Heroes, just for one day

And you, you can be mean

And I, I'll drink all the time

'Cause we're lovers, and that is a fact

Yes we're lovers, and that is that

Though nothing, will keep us together

We could steal time, just for one day

We can be Heroes, for ever and ever

What d'you say?

I, I wish you could swim

Like the dolphins, like dolphins can swim

Though nothing, nothing will keep us together

We can beat them, for ever and ever

Oh we can be Heroes, just for one day

I, I will be king

And you, you will be queen

Though nothing will drive them away

We can be Heroes, just for one day

We can be us, just for one day

I, I can remember (I remember)

Standing, by the wall (by the wall)

And the guns, shot above our heads (over our heads)

And we kissed, as though nothing could fall (nothing could fall)

And the shame, was on the other side

Oh we can beat them, for ever and ever

Then we could be Heroes, just for one day

We can be Heroes

We can be Heroes

We can be Heroes

Just for one day

We can be Heroes

We're nothing, and nothing will help us

Maybe we're lying, then you better not stay

But we could be safer, just for one day

Oh-oh-oh-ohh, oh-oh-oh-ohh, just for one day

This song makes me waaaay cry , sorry

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Hi people,

New user here & just been reading (well had a quick scan through -will read more laters) these posts. So thought I would add my experiences here.

Ok so just to clarify I am male 34yo and GAY *shock horror* lol I have been a RLBK amp for 13yrs yet with my partner for 14 yrs, so they have obviously known me before and after the amp.

I shall try to explain this as carefully as possible without being too graphic, so you might have use your imagination along the way.

Now we've all had those wonderful experiences with phantom pain/limb etc.

Ok so imagine the two of us are in bed getting intimate.........(erm him with me - if you know what I mean) and whilst he has been ........erm.........behind me ( ;) ) I have had the most horrendous phantom pain. So much so that he has had to stop doing what he was doing. It was quite a shock the first time it happened as I couldnt see the connection.........still can't. Still get the phantom limb/pain all these years on but not as bad.

And for the record depending on the situation I can have me limb on or off, getting intimate is just as good either way. As they once said to me 'It's not your leg I want to.................****' :o

Cheers people

Mark

xx

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Hey Mark, i commend you for your openess, no "shock horror" from me, as far as i am concerned we're here because we are amputees, whatever else we are be it "straight" or "gay" doesn't matter, we all have feelings and needs.

As for why you experience phantom pain at such a crucial time, it must have something to do with the nerve paths, probably some kind of cross over between the two sensations.

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Yeah I'm actually tipping a combination of nerve and an increase in blood supply. ;)

Remind me to try it. :P

Cat

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Oh by the way Mark..welcome to the family :lol:

Cat

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Hiyya Mark , why a shocker ? We are here for eachother and it dodosent matter if a person has a same sex partner or not . The ONLY thin that matters is that our world be filled with love and peace and kindeness and goodnesses form everyone . Oh ya , how do you know your the obnly one ? heheheee..... :P :P :P

Welcome to the forum and post ofetn , vent till you turm blue if you need to and be welcomed by everyone . :D :D :D

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Hi Mark-I think you'll find there's little to no homophobia on this board mate :D

That's VERY interesting what you said though about your phantom pain though and brings me to another subject I almost feel like starting a whole other thread on and that's the connection between the phantom pain and certain parts of the body and functions relating to those certain body parts if you know what I mean? :rolleyes:

Just to clarify, when I first had my amputation I was in shock for several days so hardly ate or drank anything, thus reducing the need for the 'opening of ones bowels'-that's the technical term they use in hospital lol :lol: Anyway, nurses began to get all uptight about it and my big sis' gave me the 'you do NOT want them to give you an enema do you?' talk. Still nothing! After about 5 days the evil evil night nurse gave me my usual high dose of sleepers and JUST as I was drifting into the semi-comatose state I was AMBUSHED :o :blink::angry: I could faintly here the 'squeak squeak' of one of those nasty little medical trollies coming my way and next thing you know they'd sneaked up on me and suppositorised me-MEGA :o :blink::angry::angry:

The upshot (or downshot I guess lol) the next day was success but the PAIN OMG I screamed the ward down because it caused SOOOOOO much phantom pain in my leg. Yes guys it now really hurt whenever I had a poo-really badly!!! There are some things one expects to be able to take for granted in life and taking a crap without it being that bad an experience I guess I've had to exclude from the list :( -_- -_-

This carried on for years but is now a lot better than it was and its much more like just a twinge in my leg these days-but it's all got to be to do with the nervous system without a doubt and how the brain tried to do it's own remapping or what have you as I posted a link about further up here ^^^^^^^^^.

Sorry if I've lowered the tone (again) folks but I can't surely be the only one to experience this and Mark your experience sounds very much the same sort of thing.

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Hey Guys,

I can't join in this one - cos I'v been single for so long - I've forgotten the feeling!!!!!! (5 years - oh my god, sounds like an eternity!) - Thank heaven for Duracel !! ;) :D

Cazzy, your story about being ambushed sounds horrendous - bet you can't bear the sound of rubber gloves ever again! :P

Mark, didn't shock - what ever floats your boat is my thinking! :rolleyes:

Anyway...I've wondered about what will happen if....and when....do you say before, during or after????? About the leg I mean - not the fact that its been so long! :blink:

I suppose I haven't met anyone I want to share with again - been on my own with my children for so long now. Go out with the girls and stuff - but maybe I'm too fussy?

Oh - I'm a RBK for almost a year now.

Sue - Cardiff - UK :rolleyes:

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Hi Sue,

Cardiff here too....well just Nth of, we've 'spoken' on the Limbless Assoc website.

With regards to before during or after, I'd say best to go with Before, That way when 'something' happens its not a shock. And if you tell them before least you get to see their reaction......all being well a positive one :)

Take care & speak again soon

Mark

xx

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Hey Mark,

Thanks for the tip!

I'm right near the centre of Cardiff - about a 10 min drive, and I work in the City Centre - stones throw from the rail station.

Sue - Cardiff.

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Cazzy I feel like I know you now much better than I should :rolleyes:

Don't quite know what the connection is but if you experienced it then it must be fact.

Thankfully I have never suffered that way and hope not to either.

Cat

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