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lynnieb

Dreams

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I still dream of having two working arms, even though it has been three years since I lost the use of my arm. I feel that until I accept things in my dreams, I won't accept things in life. I still get really frustrasted, especially as I have other serious medical problems. I have neurofibromatosis so have tumours all over, including in my spine and aorta.

Some days I get very down, even thougfh I know things coukd be worse. When I see how many horrible things are happening in the world I feel guilty for feeling sorry for myself.

Does anyonre else have these feelings?

Lynn xx

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Hi Lynn,

I don't think the dreams will ever end. I still have dreams that I still have two legs and I lost my leg 31 years ago when I was 3. I also have neurofibromatosis. Tumors on my skin, a tomor on the back of my head that is VERY irritating. It hits right on the strap of my welding hood. Starts to hurt after wearing it for 8 hours.

Good luck, Eric

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Lynn , dreams ? Yup , gots lots of those ... idream of never having to have livrd the stuff from the past ... i dream of walking just like eveeryone else .. i dream of eternal peace on earth ... i dream of a prefect life .... AND ... i dream of one day soon being " ONE " , etrnaly embracing and walking hand in hand foreveer without having to worry about the furture . Yes , dreams DO come true if you wish for them hard enough and are willing to help make them happen .

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Hi there Lynn!

Yes I know that things can always be worse! No matter what we go through there is someone that has it harder.

Now having said that, this is a little something that hurts when it is said to you (by well meaning people) " well I guess it could be worse or as just said there are peole worse off than you". When we are going through a hard time or in pain our heads aren't in the best of places and when someone tries to make light of how you are feeling it sometimes adds to this stress. We're not looking for sympathy at these times just that what you're going through is difficult and no matter how positive a person you are there are days that one gets overwhelmed with it all!

These days will pass but at those moments it's support that's needed,

Yes, I still dream of times when I have my leg -they are so real. I don't think it's denial just a longing for what was. Nothing truer than you don't miss it until it's gone. I think I will always dream of having my leg - but that won't change my determination to do what I want - i'm open to anything(wow my husband would like that comment :lol: ) He'd be saying "ANYTHING" ;)

So keep dreaming - I think it's a good thing.

Keep Smiling! Wendy

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Yep, I dream sometimes (only sometimes) that I'm walking on 2 legs.

I did just that the other night and in my dream I remember thinking...but you can't be walking on your legs - you've taken the leg off..and then I woke with a jump and thought I was falling over......and I hadn't been on the Baileys - honest!!!!! :D

I guess its part of our memory bank - and will happen occasionally?

Sue - Cardiff - UK :rolleyes:

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Yes I have a lot of dreams that I am doing something

and I am walking normally again. But I have accepted

it and it is so great to dream but the reality can never

change. But dreaming means your still alive.

Its only been a year and believe me I am no

expert.!!!!

Lesley

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Hi all,

I must begin to feel a bit strange about myself when I am reading your posts on your dreams of getting back your lost limb and then reality hitting back, as I do not have such dreams. I also very rarely have nightmares; instead, I often wake up from dreams that are exciting or pleasurable and am disappointed that I cannot get back to my dream after waking up. Great movies go wasted. In my dreams I however appear normal to myself and I do not know whether I have flesh leg or a wooden one.

Could it be that dealing with my wooden leg has become such a routine that I forget that I have one, during the hours when I am awake? There is an exception though; that is when I have screwed up really badly on stump care or being plain reckless. This means that my stump reminds me of having a wooden leg by giving discomfort. Otherwise I feel perfectly normal, not being any different from two legged people.

Sometimes it is worth of being a little cockoo.

Kind regards,

Jukka

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Sue, are you sure the Bailey's wasn't opened ?? :lol:

I think it has to do with how long one has been living with the amputation. I don't have these subconcious dreams of having two legs as i have grown up (well 2/3 rds of my life) with only one. So i guess, you just get used to it.

I used to have nightmares the first few years, but as they say 'time is a healer' - phew!

Jukka, i think at a certain stage you just 'grow in' to your situation where you do feel so completely 'normal' , which is ofcourse GREAT !

...and yes, it does help to be a bit coockoo too...hehehe

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Kaz,

I am only three (3) years amp now and yet feel that it is normal to be an amp.

Am I a little more cockoo than first thought?

Jukka

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Wow... Good for you! :lol:

Well, i think it is actually excepting yourself as being 'whole'. I personally needed alot of time to do this and only recently see myself this way. Everyone heals at different speeds in different ways. I think dreaming is important to help the mind open up and move forward.

Maybe it has more to do with then just time as a healer...hmm, possibly a positive frame of mind...and ofcourse a little bit of coockooness thrown in can only help :D

Again (i know i keep going on about it...sorry!) but i believe cosmetics plays a huge role , well for me it does :blink: and the prosthesis itself making as least hassle as possible.( No bits and pieces falling off...which i have also experienced in the most awkward situations ...) :unsure: Now this is a nightmare....

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I have yet to remember any dreams since my amputation. When I still had my right leg, it was in bad shape for about a year. In my dreams the leg usually worked and could bend perfectly even though in real-life it was infected most of the time and as stiff as a board. I would expect to have "two-legged" dreams. Even in my conscious thoughts, I still see myself with both legs sometimes. That's probably because my amputation is still fairly recent.

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After my amp I would dream of my life before. Last week was the first dream I could remember having that I only had one leg. did not like it. Felt depressed for about a day or two. I had hoped that in my dreams at least I could still be normal. That has been even taken away now. Feeling frustrated lately. Nothing seems to be going right yet. Still trying.

Tonya

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Ha - No the Baileys wasn't opened - well not that night anyway!!!!

I'm only 7 months post op and I forget that sometimes - as I'm doing so well. I usually have nice dreams as well, and have only had the one where I am walking on 2 legs twice - but thats ok. Could have been worse - could have tried to get out of bed and ended up in a heap on the bedroom floor!!! :lol:

Speaking of dreams - when I was in hospital I had an external fixator on the mangled foot - before the amp (obviously!) and I was given strong pain killers - had very weird dreams - all out of proportion and weird things happening!! I remember one really well - a sort of circus / fairground dream and lots of clowns chasing me...........must have been confusing the dream with work I think.... :P

Sue - Cardiff - UK :rolleyes:

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Up until i had read this thread i had not had dreams that involved my leg/legs at all so it just goes to show how the sub-concious works, because last night i dreamt about wiggling my toes. In the dream i was wiggling the toes on my amputated foot so i hadn`t been dreaming about growing a new leg or that i still had both my own legs.

I put this down to the fact that reading these stories had played on my sub-concious.

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Well, let me see. I had a few dreams in the hosp. while I was sedated about the railroad but not the accident. I have dreams mostly with both my legs still. Only a couple dreams w/o them, and one very disappointing dream where I was dreaming and a miracle happened and my legs were restored. I woke up and cried. That has been the worse one. Most dreams are kinda a bummer since I am doing things I can't do right now. I look forward to sleeping as I feel better not remembering I have lost my legs. Well, I hope I haven't been too depressing. God bless. ....................................Vince

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Hi lynnieb, I can't really say I've had that many dreams, in my eight years of being an amp, not that I recall anyways. However, when I first came home, I'd wake up in the middle of the night, looking under the covers for the rest of my leg. My husband would talk to me, until I stopped crying and went back to sleep. That went away after awhile, thank goodness, it was a bit frightening. :blink: But as time went on, more pleasant things began to happen, at least now I know my leg is beside the bed, not under the covers!! :D

I agree with Kaz, I too think at a certain stage you just learn to grow into your situation. Of course, that doesn't necessarily mean you like the situtation anymore than before, but rather, you learn better how to adjust to it. Then you'll start to feel 'complete' again, inside and out and what a good feeling to have back. :D

You know, sometimes no matter how aware we are of the worse circumstances around us, we still find the need, once in awhile, to self indulge in our own pity. I believe it is perfectly normal, every so often. It seems to me any ways, that it flushes the body out, so to get a better perspective on things. Just knowing that someone is worse off, doesn't always compensate for some of the emotional turmoil you may be feeling inside. I think time is the best healer of all.

Sheila LBK

Southern Maine USA

Keep Smiling :)

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